META: This sub is moving towards a value system that frequently doesn't align with the rest of the world

I’ve enjoyed reading and posting on this sub for many months now. I feel as though I’ve noticed a disconcerting trend, however - that the sub is moving towards a relatively selfish, individualistic, and generally ‘asshole-ish’ set of values that (from my observation) aren’t shared by most people.<br><br>Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think there’s anything inherently wrong with many of the things the sub advocates for - avoiding enabling, ensuring you don’t get taken advantage of, etc. I do think there’s a distinction to be made between being a selfish asshole and just attempting to prevent yourself from being taken advantage of in the first place. I’ve seen many, many stories where people were punished (quite vehemently) by the sub for not standing up for themselves, and the consensus would often be that the person TO tell someone to fuck off for trying to use them because the person didn’t stand up for themselves sooner. Like, the person on the chamber will get blamed in the comments for being a “pushover” when it made perfect sense to stay quiet in the moment, and to instead tell the person off on the subreddit. Like, yeah I guess the comments in the chamber are technically true, but they aren’t super helpful and the value system that they illustrate doesn’t totally make sense to me. It also seems to be becoming more and more common on the sub for people to urge others not to help people in distress with no good reason. <br><br>For example, I think the average person would be extremely disappointed in someone who didn’t help an elderly person carry their groceries only because they had once been stood up (with no further contact with the person) but the comments in this sub would be like “fuck them, they stood you up once. Get a better friend.” That’s just not how real relationships work, and most people would never stand by that behavior. I don’t think you should go out of your way to help someone who treated you poorly, but it seems crazy to suggest that someone should completely ignore an elderly person struggling to carry groceries just because they once stood them up. In the real world, people don’t fuck elderly men over because they (the elderly man) stood them up, without any other context.<br><br>I’m not sure if the majority of the people who post here have primarily (or exclusively) been surrounded by assholes, but the way we respond to things like this on the chamber just don’t line up with how people in real life react to situations like these. <br><br>TL;DR: The values and logics that this sub increasingly uses don’t match the values and logics of the average person.