How do you (46F) convince a guy (40M) you have been with for 2 years to do his own laundry and stop making his mom do it for him?

My boyfriend (40M) has been with me (46F) for 2 years. Thing is that he has never done laundry in his entire life. I asked why. He was raised by a single mother throughout childhood and she never wanted to burden him with stuff like laundry or something. I believed it. <br><br>During the first few months, I was doing his laundry. He was very very very sweet. I never had complaints about him. He considered me his best friend. He took care of me and spoiled me. He made me feel loved and admired etc. So I figured "why not help him out?" <br><br>4 months into our relationship his mother (67F) moved to be closer to him. She had no idea that I was doing his laundry. She started doing it again. I got mad because I thought she was undermining me. She got mad at me for doing his laundry. <br><br>I was confused. This was my first real issue with him. I asked why. He said he didn't want to burden me and thought I was doing it out of obligation. I told him it was fine. But then he said his mother wanted to do it and I got mad at him and told him to do his own laundry. <br><br>He said he was too busy. I told him I was too busy. He refused to do it. I asked if I should tell his mother to keep doing it or if I should keep doing it. He asked if I could do it because he didn't want his mom to tire herself out. I got mad at him. <br><br>I told him that I will not be doing his laundry anymore and that his mother can do it. Later he apologized and said I don't have to do his laundry but he'd appreciate it if I did. I got mad again. <br><br>So what happened was that I continued doing his laundry but he would give something to his mother occasionally whenever she came over throughout the week. So he works with me in the same office. And he'd come over during lunch to kiss me or whatever. I only realized his mom was doing something because she sometimes leaves dishes or something in my kitchen cabinets. <br><br>I took them up on it and asked if they could stop. But they both denied it! So I tried leaving out laundry that I haven't done yet and whenever I come back from work it was gone! <br><br>I am beyond frustrated. I told him he hasn't contributed to the household his entire life and that he needs to think about what other ways he is freeloading off of us. I asked him to pay rent or buy groceries or do other chores. He agreed. But he has not done laundry since. <br><br>I told him to either buy his mom a washing machine or stop sending his laundry to her. He said okay. But then he still sends it to her. I am so fucking annoyed! <br><br>I do not want to break up with him. But I feel like I am his mother. Can someone please help?