My MIL told my wife that she wished she could abort her

I had to sit on this for a few hours before deciding I need to be brave. I have never posted my personal story on the internet anywhere before. I am an Asian guy married to an East European woman. We have a 2 year old daughter. I know I am running the risk of judgement, but I desperately need advice. I am getting really lost in my situation. I am not sure if I am ready to post this, but this story is too heavy to be carried alone. I am being direct and I admit what I am doing is not justified or makes sense. I have been in a 9 year serious relationship since I was 20 years old. My wife and I met in college and got married 7 years ago. We waited to be financially secure before having a child. We were both very happy to have a child and everyone around us was excited to see our baby girl. With marriage, my relationship with my inlaws improved a lot. Mostly because my wife handles things well and they just get along.<br><br>My wife runs a private online school for Asian kids studying abroad (mainly China and Korea) while I work a regular 9-5 job in finance. We are upper middle class and quite well off. We live in a 4 bedroom house near the beach. My wife is very wealthy because her business boomed during the pandemic and she saved a lot of money through smart investments and frugal spending. In comparison, I make a decent living but nothing close to what she earns. My wife has been very generous to my family and helped us financially with her money. <br><br>The problem is that my MIL has slowly changed her behavior over the past year. She started being more overbearing and demanding. She would ask us to constantly send pictures of our baby girl to the family group chat and get mad if we dont. She would comment on my wife’s posts to make passive remarks about parenting. Recently, she started visiting unannounced and without permission. She lets herself into our house and snoops around. We confronted her about this and she said “I am your mother, I should be able to come over anytime I want.”<br><br>Around 2 weeks ago, my wife had a huge argument with my MIL. My MIL told my wife that she wished she could abort her when she was pregnant because she felt miserable about her pregnancy and she was too young to be a mother. Then MIL went on about how my wife is not a good mother and accused her of purposefully trying to make her life difficult. <br><br>My wife called me crying and begging me to fix this situation. I know I need to protect her, but the truth is I am scared of getting involved. My MIL told my wife those hurtful words because of me. I confess that I had an affair 9 months ago and my MIL found out. I know it is not justified and I am not trying to shift blame onto anyone else. I was in a really bad mental state at the time and I did the unthinkable. I have been trying to make it right since then but it is hard. I just want to say that the affair is over and I am committed to making my marriage work. I have begged for my wife’s forgiveness and we are in couples therapy.<br><br>The reason why my MIL said those things is because my MIL thinks my wife is keeping me from seeing my family. My MIL confronted me about the affair and I confessed. I promised to keep our family together no matter what. MIL said that my wife is an unfaithful woman and she stole our happiness. She believes my wife is only staying in the marriage for our daughter and the money. MIL said my affair happened because my wife is frigid and doesn’t want to have sex with me. MIL made me promise to stay with my wife and promised to help me win my wife back.<br><br>After the argument, MIL didnt come to visit for a week. Wife is afraid to go out and she doesnt want to take our baby outside. Wife is afraid MIL will show up at our house again and she will say something worse to her. MIL went silence and wife is worried that she is planning something bad. Wife wants to move to another city to get away from my family. I have to choose between my wife and family. I am being selfish by staying in the marriage but I dont want to lose my family. MIL told me that she will cut my wife and baby out of her life if I divorce my wife. I am really scared and I dont want my family to break down.<br><br>I dont know if anyone is reading this. Any advice is greatly appreciated. I am lost and really scared of what will happen.<br><br>EDIT: There was a lot of confusion about my timeline so I want to clarify that my MIL found out 9 months ago that I had an affair. I confessed to my wife 9 months ago and she agreed to stay in the marriage on the condition of therapy. My MIL has been visiting us more often and the visits have become more frequent in the past 3 months. My wife and I are expecting our second child. Thank you to everyone who commented and DM’d. You guys gave me the courage to take action. I have made my decision and it is the right one for me and my wife. I am sorry to disappoint but I am a private person and I dont want to discuss my MIL’s health or any other personal details. I appreciate your concern.