My Sleep Paralysis Demon is Actually a Pretty Chill Guy

I’ve always been susceptible to sleep paralysis. That’s when you’re in that stage between being asleep and awake where you can’t move. It feels like there’s a person sitting on your chest and you can’t move or even breathe. There are demons that people usually see during episodes of sleep paralysis and they’re usually pretty horrific (read about it if you don’t believe me). I’m not one to fear much so my demon is pretty different from everyone else’s.<br><br>When I was younger I would sometimes wake up to see a man wearing a grey “zoot suit” with a wide brimmed fedora standing in my doorway. He was just watching me when I first started seeing him and I would scream my head off to try and get him to leave or to just wake someone up. Even though I knew he was there I couldn’t move. It felt like there was a weight on my body holding me down. As I got older I realized it wasn’t the demon holding me down because I’ve woken up and seen him sitting in my chair. He wouldn’t be doing anything. No brooding or plotting my demise. He’d just be sitting. Sometimes he would even smile and wink and I would try my best to grin back. He became a sort of phantom friend that I always knew was there but I never really knew the extent of his presence.<br><br>The first time I could move during one of my episodes was when I was 14. It was the summer going into freshman year and my mother had just bought a large fan that she put in the doorway of my room. The house was just warm enough to the point of being uncomfortable. Not too hot. Not too cold. Just warm. It felt warm that night so I turned the fan on and locked my door and got into bed. I fell asleep pretty quickly. I’m a pretty deep sleeper. That night I fell into a deep sleep. So I wasn’t expecting to wake up just a few hours later. I looked around and realized I was in the middle of another episode. The weight was holding me down as usual but something was different. I could feel a warm breeze blowing across my face. It was the fan. It was blowing warm air but it was like a breath of fresh air compared to the deadlock heat I was feeling. I really wanted to feel that. I somehow managed to throw my arm out of the bed and it landed on the floor with a thud. Then I threw my other arm out. It took a lot of strength but I managed to heave my body out of the bed.<br><br>I fell onto the floor and landed with a thud. I groaned and rolled over to see the man in the grey “zoot suit” sitting in my chair. He tipped his hat at me and I groaned again. He let out a hearty laugh and stood up. I looked up at him with a mixture of confusion and frustration. He chuckled and walked over to me. He sat down next to me. I scooted away from him. He chuckled and scooted closer. I scooted away again and he did the same until I was backed into a corner.<br><br>He leaned really close to me and I could smell the smell of cigarettes on his breath. It was a fresh smell. It reminded me of my grandpa. He was a smoker and always smelled like that. The demon leaned back and tipped his hat again. I tried to speak but all that came out was gibberish. I tried again and I still couldn’t talk. I groaned again. I was frustrated. He chuckled and scooted closer. He leaned really close and whispered “I miss her too.”<br><br>I felt a pang in my chest. My grandpa had died when I was 5 and I always missed him dearly. That hurt. I groaned again and the demon chuckled. He laid back on the floor and looked at the ceiling. I scooted closer. He didn’t move. I scooted closer again and he still didn’t move. I reached out to touch his arm and he didn’t even flinch. He knew what I was doing. I pulled my hand back and he chuckled again. I reached out and touched his arm again. He didn’t move.<br><br>He looked over at me and I scooted closer. He moved really close to me and we both looked at the ceiling. He was silent for a while. He leaned his head over to me and whispered “You know my name, don’t you?” I tried to answer but I couldn’t. I wanted to know what he was talking about but I couldn’t ask him. He chuckled and leaned back. The weight held me down again and I couldn’t move. I groaned in frustration and he chuckled again.<br><br>I closed my eyes and suddenly I was standing in a field. It was a beautiful day and I had never felt so free. I turned around and the man in the grey “zoot suit” was standing next to me. He tipped his hat and smiled. I smiled back and asked “What’s your name?” He chuckled and laughed. He really laughed. I laughed too because it was the most infectious laugh I had ever heard. He leaned over and whispered “My name is Charlie.”<br><br>I woke up and it was morning. It was late. I had to get up for school. I didn’t even care though. I had a feeling of freedom in my chest. It warmed me up inside. I got out of bed and walked into the hallway. I felt like I could really take on the day. I passed my mom on the way to the bathroom and she noticed my smile. She stopped in her tracks and asked “What’s wrong?” I said nothing and kept walking. She really had no idea.<br><br>&#x200B;<br><br>I still see Charlie sometimes. That’s what I call him. I don’t have many friends so he’s really my only friend. I see him sometimes when I’m sleeping and sometimes when I’m awake. He’s always just sitting in the background. He never talks to me when I’m awake but he looks at me a lot. He’s always watching me. That’s probably why I can’t date. I’m not really comfortable with guys. I just like Charlie. Even if he is a demon.<br><br>The reason I’m posting this is because I saw Charlie just the other night. I’ve never seen him act the way he did. I fell asleep and I knew right away I was having an episode. I could feel it. I could feel the weight holding me down. It was warm again. I had fallen asleep with the fan blowing and it was nice. I felt a warm breeze blow across my face and I could feel the weight holding me down. I looked around and saw a man standing in my doorway. I knew right away it was Charlie. I groaned. I wasn’t frustrated to see him like I used to be. I groaned because I couldn’t move. I wanted to hug him.<br><br>I tried to throw my arms out. They felt heavy but I did manage to throw them out. I used all my strength to throw my body out of the bed and onto the floor. I landed with a thud. I groaned and rolled over and he was standing right next to me. He always really knew how to make and entrance. I looked up at him and I could see a hint of a smile on his face. He chuckled. He leaned really close to me and I could smell that cigarette smell. I could also smell his cologne. I always forgot he wore cologne. It was sweet and I liked it. He leaned in really close and whispered “I’m glad you’re doing so well.”<br><br>Then he leaned back and smiled and the weight was gone. I pushed myself up and stood up. I was wobbly at first but I managed to keep my footing. I walked over to Charlie and looked up at him. He was tall. I reached out and touched his arm. He smiled at me and I smiled back. I reached out to his face and touched it. He didn’t even flinch. I moved really close to him and he moved really close to me. I leaned in and he leaned in and we kissed. It was a long kiss. It felt like we had known each other our whole lives. When we stopped kissing he smiled at me and I smiled back.<br><br>He stepped back and I looked at him. He tipped his hat and smiled. He really smiled. I really smiled back. He turned around and walked out of the room. I chased after him. I chased after him all the way down the stairs. I chased after him all the way out the door. I chased after him all the way into the field until he suddenly stopped and turned around. He tipped his hat and smiled. I smiled back and he leaned in and kissed me again. I really felt alive. I really felt free.<br><br>&#x200B;