My [31M] ex [27F] wants to be friends three years after she ghosted me.

My ex called me up out of the blue after not speaking for three years. <br><br>She seemed nervous and said she wanted to catch up and be friends. I asked her to remind me why I would want that. She got very quiet and said she was sorry for how she treated me, that I was only good to her and she would like to be friends if I was willing to. <br><br>I wanted to say yes, because it was nice seeing her name pop up on my screen. It was like a switch turned my brain off and I said yes before I could reconsider. I almost walked it back but she was so excited that I let it ride. <br><br>We talked for a few hours, I asked her about what she has been up to and she took over the conversation for most of the time. Later, we both realized that I hadn't said much about what was happening with me. I ended up telling her about my job and how I got a promotion, but for some reason she didn't seem too thrilled that I had even moved on from her. I don't understand. <br><br>We talked a few more times and she wanted me to meet her family. I have met them before but she wanted us to go on a camping trip with them. She has never taken me to meet her family before, I never had the chance. She seemed upset that I didn't want to go. I didn't understand why she was pushing so much. <br><br>Am I overreacting? She keeps bringing up things like I feel bad I never had the chance to meet her family and gets teary eyed about it. She wants me to go to church with her and the extended family too. All of this is stuff I wanted to do when we were dating. For some reason I am put off by how much she wants me to be around her. <br><br>She only talks about the things I feel I missed out on when we first dated. It's like she wants me to do all the things I wanted to do when we were together. I'm not sure if I want to be around her this much. <br><br>I feel bad for her because I feel like I am rejecting her, but I don't really want what she is offering. I just thought it would be nice to say hi and catch up a bit. Why am I so bad at reading people? <br><br>Any thoughts on this? TIA<br><br>EDIT: To be clear, she came from a very strict religious home and growing up in such a home. I wanted to wait until she was comfortable with the relationship to introduce me to her family and church. I felt that it was important that she feel safe in telling her family about me and that she was right with God with such a decision. Because of this she never got to introduce me to her family and I think that is a source of guilt for her. I can understand why she wants me to meet them now. But to want me to introduce her parents and family to my dog, to meet mine, for them to meet each other, to go to church together and to have our families meet seems too much. I understand where her desire to have this is coming from. I don't understand why she is pushing so hard for this. <br><br>EDIT: I think I need to talk to her about how I feel. Going back to what I said about her family, I would be glad for her to meet mine. I would love for her to meet them and I would be glad if my family could meet hers. But I think the way she is approaching the subject is making me upset. I think she wants more than I am willing to give and I had no idea that this would be how I felt. <br><br>I feel like I am in a weird place, I want to help her feel better about how she acted and I want to be there for her. In a way I am happy for her that she is doing so well. You should see her artwork, it is amazing. I am a bit feel good that I was a part of that. <br><br>On the other hand, I am worried that she is too emotionally invested in the idea of us being together again. I am not ready to be in a relationship again and I had no idea that this would be how I feel. <br><br>I feel like I am in a weird place, I want to help her feel better about how she treated me and I want to be there for her. In a way I am very feel good that I had a chance to see that she is doing so well. You should see her artwork, it is amazing. I am a bit feel good that I was a part of that. <br><br>On the other hand, I am worried that she is too emotionally invested in the idea of us being together again. I am not ready to be in a relationship again and I had no idea that this would be how I feel. <br><br>I am not sure what to do. I am just going to send her a text to talk to her about what I am feeling. I hope she understands.<br><br>EDIT: I told her that I felt she was pushing too hard for what she wanted, that I wanted to help her feel better but I didn't feel ready to be in a relationship again. That I wanted to help her, but I still need time to trust her. She came over to sign some papers for a project we are doing together. I tried to talk to her about it, I had written some notes that I wanted to share with her. She started crying and didn't want to hear me out. I offered to let her stay at my place and feel comfortable talking to me whenever she was ready. I showed her the note and she didn't seem to want to read it. <br><br>I told her that I couldn't answer questions that she didn't ask and that I couldn't stop her from feeling that way. I told her I would give her space and I would talk to her later. She didn't really say anything to me. I tried to let her cry on me but I'm not sure it helped. I told her to help herself to a glass of wine, and that I would be in my room if she needed to talk later. I went to my room and I heard the front door close. I came out to see if she was okay and she was gone. I didn't hear the door to the garage close so I went out to see if she was okay. She was hugging herself, she looked very upset. She looked at me and she looked broken. I got in my car and followed her to her place. She was crying when I got there. I let her cry for a bit, then I tried to talk through things with her. <br><br>I told her that I understood she wanted me back, that I was willing to give her another chance. That I had to move slowly, that I wasn't ready for a relationship yet. She looked at me and said stop. I stopped. Why did she get angry that I wanted to give her another chance? I am so confused. I don't know what's happening. I don't know what she wants now. I don't understand. <br><br>EDIT: I didn't hear from her for a few days and when I reached out she told me that she needed space. I told her that I understood and that I would give her space. She wrote back and said that she was sorry for how she treated me and that she doesn't know what she wants. I told her that it's okay if she doesn't know what she wants, that I feel the same way. I told her I was willing to give her space and give her time to figure out what she wants.<br><br>Oh! And I almost forgot to mention that she started crying when I had mentioned that I wasn't ready for a relationship again. <br><br>This is a big edit because I want to recognize something. I was too hard on her and due to that, this all went to shit. I should have been more compassionate and understanding. I am an asshole, I recognize this. I should have just been understanding and listened to her. She pointed out that I don't know who she is anymore. I don't. I should have tried to get to know her. I should have been more understanding. I should have been more compassionate. I should have just listened to her. I should have been more empathetic. I should have treated her better. <br><br>What I did was not okay. I made her feel bad and I treated her badly. I had no right to do that. She apologized. I never acknowledged her apology. I never gave her the respect that she deserved. I should have been more understanding. I should have been more empathetic. I should have been more compassionate. I never had the right to treat her the way that I did. I feel bad about that. I never meant to make her feel bad. <br><br>Oh well. I look like an asshole. I guess I will just own up to it. I never feel good about hurting people. I should have treated her better. I never had the right to treat her the way that I did. I never feel good about hurting people. I never feel good about treating people badly. I feel bad about how I treated her. I should have treated her better. I am sorry. <br><br>She had every right to be upset. I feel bad that I hurt her. I should have treated her better. I am sorry. I look like an asshole. I am an asshole. <br><br>I am recognizing now that I should have been more compassionate. I should have been more empathetic. I should have treated her better. <br><br>I don't know what to do. I am just going to start with apologizing and go from there.