Can’t seem to cry no matter how hard I try

I’ve been enjoying my morning coffee which hasn’t given me any heartburn! <br><br>This is a win. <br><br>I’ve been listening to my favorite music while I clean my house! <br><br>This is a win. <br><br>I finally got a haircut from a new stylist! They barely had any flaws and I can let it grow out. <br><br>This is a win. <br><br>My boss has been giving me more compliments the past few days and really acknowledging my hard work! <br><br>This is a win!<br><br>I have been going to therapy and they give me such reassurance and aren’t afraid to call me cute and give me a high five at the end of the session!<br><br>This is a win. <br><br>I’m doing really well!<br><br>But I should have gotten my Ph.D…. <br><br>I should have been able to work at a different university and get tenure. <br><br>I should have followed up with the school I applied to in order to teach. <br><br>I should have been a goody and not called in sick as much…. <br><br>I’m not crying. I’m choking back tears writing this.