I woke up and nobody was there to wish me happy birthday because I don’t have friends

I don’t know why I’m writing this but I don’t really have anyone to talk to so here I am. I’m not one for pity. Very very against it, but I honestly didn’t expect to wake up and find that nobody got me a card, nobody wished me happy birthday or got me a present. I woke up to an empty silent house. I’m 21. I’m officially an adult. It’s kinda sad to think my childhood is officially over but you know what the real kicker was in all of this? Nobody even said happy birthday. I got a standard ‘I’ll see you soon’ and then I was dropped off at home. I know this isn’t anyone else’s fault, I know I did this. It’s my own fault nobody cared. These things take work. I’m just so incredibly alone it’s unreal. I’ve been alone for so long I just want someone to break into my house one night and fuck my brains out then leave. I don’t even care if it’s unsafe. I’m not afraid. I just want to feel something other than this loneliness.<br><br>I’ve been alone in a crowd for so long. I sit in a class full of students and I’m alone. Nobody fuckin cares. Nobody at all. I hate this so much, I’m so tired of it. I don’t understand what I’m doing wrong but I know I’m doing something wrong. fuck.<br><br>I got more birthday cards when I was a kid than I did now. fuckin pathetic.