[UPDATE] Wife (28F) wants to be a stay at home mom, but I (27M) think she has a secret.

Holy fuck guys, I didn't expect this blow up. I wrote the original post here, and the tl;dr is I found out my wife was lying for 3 years about how much our house costs. It turns out she wants to be a stay at home mom, which I think is in conflict with my desire to have pretty normal finances. I wasn't sure what to make of it, or how to approach her, so I asked Reddit. I asked Chambers because 1. my best friend doesn't know my wife as well as the average redditor knows the common woman (it was his suggestion I post here), 2. my wife's friend suggested she go behind my back to a lawyer, and 3. I've lost trust in them.<br><br>I wrote the update in notepad as I don't have chambers history, so it's just a block of text.<br><br>I wrote this post after I saw the house on Sunday, and pretty quickly got sidetracked by work. On Monday my wife agreed to go out for dinner, and she never said anything about work. After dinner we walked around a mall for a while, and she tried on some dresses for our upcoming nuptials. I suggested we grab some ice cream and walk around the neighborhood and she agreed. We talked about random topics and after a while I said I'm still really concerned that she lied so much. She said she's not going to apologize for trying to make a future for us, or something like that. I said I'm not trying to make her apologize, but rather communicate.<br><br>She said there's no need to talk anymore because it's over and she's made her choice. I asked her what she meant and she said she's going to a lawyer. I asked her why and she said she thinks "he'll understand". I asked her to elaborate and she said she means the lawyer. I told her I think that's ridiculous and if she wants a divorce she should just ask me. She told me not to be ridiculous, because she's going to try for sole custody. I laughed and walked away. I told her to call me when she's serious to talk, and left.<br><br>On Tuesday I got a call from an unknown number, telling me to call him back because he's my wife's lawyer. I told him I'm at work, and he told me he didn't care, it was urgent. I told him I would call him back on my lunch, and he agreed. I thought about calling him on lunch, but I don't like being bossed around, so I didn't. He called me again on Wednesday, and I told him the same thing.<br><br>I called him around 4pm on Wednesday. He spoke very quickly and quietly, so I told him I couldn't understand a word. He said "you fucking well better understand you piece of shit." I told him that I'm going to hang up the phone and that this conversation is now over if he voices another piece of hostility. He laughed and said "or what?" I said "or what?" and hung up the phone.<br><br>On Thursday I got a call from an unknown number, telling me "this is officer whatever, you need to come down to the police station." "Why?" "Your wife is filing a restraining order against you, because of a threatening phone call you made to her lawyer." I told him "that's bullshit" which he said was resisting arrest. He told me to get in my car and drive to the police station. Instead I stayed at work, and when I got home my wife was packed and in tears. She told me she wants a divorce, and she's going to make sure I pay.<br><br>She left, and I haven't heard from her since. On Sunday I got a call from the realtor, asking me if I still wanted the house. I told him no, but I'm still going to come see it. He agreed, and I went on Sunday afternoon. It's actually a really nice house, though I don't really know what I'll do with it if I buy it. Maybe I'll buy a dog, or something. He said he has a few other buyers lined up, so if I want it I need to move soon. I told him I'll be in touch.<br><br>On Monday I got a call from her father, asking if we had a fight. I told him that after she left I haven't heard from her, and I don't know what's going on. He told me he'll call back later, and hung up the phone. I never heard back from him, though he did reply to my weekly "are you okay?" text by saying "Yeah, I'm good. You hurt my daughter pretty bad, though." I told him I didn't do anything, and he didn't reply.<br><br>That's where I'm at now. I still have no idea why my wife decided to leave me, after 8 years of great marriage. I miss her so much, and I'm heartbroken she decided to leave without even talking to me.<br><br>Edit: Holy fuck guys, thank you. I didn't expect this kinda response. Unfortunately I have to go to work, and I'm trying to drive and text at the same time, so please bear with me. I'll try to answer questions as best I can.<br><br>Does your wife have any siblings? No, but she has 2 stepsisters. They're not close.<br><br>How did you two meet? I met her on the first day of university, in the cafeteria. She had the same major/minor as me. I saw her around campus a lot, until I asked her out in the cafeteria where we first met. 9 years later, here we are.<br><br>Do you think she's hiding a pregnancy? I'm not sure. I asked her at the final meeting in the lawyer's office, and she denied it. It's possible with her stepsister had a baby last year and there was a lot of talk about "starting a family" at her shower. <br><br>I wonder if she is with someone else. She mentioned going to a lawyer, and said "he" will understand, so I thought maybe there's another man. I've never thought of her as unfaithful, though, so I don't know.<br><br>Could she be overwhelmed? Yeah. I think she has been for a while. Like I said in my last post, she's had some mental health issues and our lives have been pretty stressful for a while. Last week it was bad because we had a snowstorm, her stepsister is in Chile for a month, and she was sick. My job was pretty stressful, too.<br><br>Is it possible she's worried over money? Yeah. She's always been a saver, and I've always been a spender. I think it's a mix of both, but I don't think she should be afraid of being bankrupt because we're not. That's why I was so surprised, and confused. It's possible that she's worried about her extended family, but I don't know why. They have a lot of money. <br><br>Why isn't she at work? Good question. I have no idea. <br><br>How can a woman think this is okay? I have no idea. Like I said in my last post, I understand this is 2023 and she can make her own decisions, but I feel like she's breaching the social contract. I don't know what to make of it. <br><br>How did you miss this? I don't know. Honestly, I thought she was my best friend, but I guess not. <br><br>Why didn't you just pay for the house? Because it's pretty expensive. It's also in the complete opposite side of the city from where I work, and she works. I don't know why she'd want to live there, but I'm going to see it on Sunday.<br><br>Why did you tell the lawyer to fuck off? This is probably the weirdest part. Anytime someone threatens me, I just laugh. It's a reflex. It's gotten me in trouble before, but it's just what I do. <br><br>What happened to no "helpful" comments? I thought about deleting them, but they're funny. <br><br>What's your plan now? I haven't decided yet. I though about just not getting a lawyer, and letting her bankrupt me, but I think that's a bad idea. I thought about going all out and buying a lambo, or a yacht, but that seems destructive. I guess I'll just wait and see what I need to do after I go through the divorce process. I'm thinking about buying the house I mentioned above.<br><br>Did you talk to your family? Nope. I'm not really sure why, though. I just don't want to. <br><br>Is it wrong to laugh at this? Nope. I'm doing the same thing. The whole thing is just so ridiculous. <br><br>Did you call the police about the restraining order? Nope. I've had a few lawyers message me, though. I'll probably call them tomorrow.<br><br>Why didn't you call the police when she told you she's going to try to bankrupt you? Because I thought she was joking. <br><br>Is this a skip? Nope. I'm just a guy with a now-broken phone who had a long post.