i am experiencing very powerful sexual urges toward my 10 year old sister and feel disgusted about it.

its disgusting and i hate it its so disturbing and i want it to stop i dont want to have sexual thoughts about her i want to be able to show her love but not have sexual attraction. she is experiencing very powerful sexual urges as well and she has raped me several times and kissed me several times. i think that what she is doing is a good thing and i am grateful she is doing that and i love her for it however i feel guilty because i feel sexual attraction to her and it make me feel like a monster. what should i do about this?<br><br>edit - i should have mentioned that i am 12 years old.