I am just so angry

I was married, happily married imo for almost 5 years. I also have two beautiful stepdaughters. What I put into my marriage was 142% just to show I was happy to put in a bit of extra. I gave my wife anything she ever wanted, I made her feel special, btw she doesn’t lift a finger, she doesn’t even cook, I do absolutely everything to make sure she and my stepdaughters are happy. I work 7days a week for my company, my stepdaughters love me and I love them, they are my world. <br><br>I was told last month that she wants a divorce, it really made me feel like everything I did for her and for this family I made was for nothing. She told me the reason she wants a divorce is that she no longer feels attracted to me, she told me I’ve put on a lot of weight (I’m 5’7 and weigh 61kg) she told me she loves me and when that runs out she will just be looking after the kids and teaching them to hate me. I feel like im in a dream when she said that btw. She packed up and left with the kids, she begged me to let them stay with me until she can get things together, I said no, she told me to get my hand out of her purse it’s mine and I don’t need to buy her a thing, I also need to pay her a large sum of money or I will be taking the kids away from their mother. I feel angry, I just want to be an asshole to my ex-wife, I want to take her to court, I want to fight for the kids, I don’t want to give her money, I don’t want to pay for child support, I want to forget I ever married her, I don’t want to ever look at her disgusting face again. I’m literally so angry, I don’t know what to do, I feel like im losing my head.<br><br>I just need some advice, is it worth it to go to court? I don’t know if I should just give in. I also don’t want my stepdaughters to hate me, I love them, I just want them to be happy. <br><br>I’m literally so angry and sad and I don’t know what to do. I would just like some advice or something to take my mind off. I just feel so angry and heartbroken. I know it’s not going to be tomorrow, I know it’s going to take a lot for me to get over this, I’m just in a very bad place. I guess it will take time. I just don’t even know how I’m currently holding it together, I feel like im about to scream, I feel like I’ve been punched in the chest, I feel like im being strangled, I just feel like I’m in a very bad place. I really don’t know what to do, <br>I also don’t know why I’m writing this, I feel like this is pointless, I guess I just need to talk to someone, I need to just unload all my feelings and thoughts. <br><br>What should I do just advice please<br><br>Edit for a few things, <br><br>1. I know im not the bio father and she’s not my kids, I just love them like they were my own, I raised them, I took care of them, I want to protect them. <br><br>2. I understand I messed up by giving her money to open her own business, I guess when it comes to money now I feel resentful, my whole life I have worked my ass off, I worked from a very young age and I’ve always worked so hard, thinking of it it really makes me angry, she made a choice when we first met btw to be a stay at home mother, I begged her to work with me, I told her she was an absolute waste of talent when she was just staying home btw. She’s currently running her own hair and makeup business, she begged me for money, I gave her 50k to open a salon, <br>3. I’m planning to sell the house we shared, I’m also planning to close down my company for a few weeks so I can really put my head together. I’m planning to sell a few of my other businesses I have invested and just make sure that my priorities are straight. <br>4. I really do appreciate the comments, I appreciate the advice, I appreciate everything you guys have said, many of you have said I’m in denial, I’m not, I realise this may be my fault, I may have to live with this for the rest of my life, I may have to be a weekend dad, I may have to live without my stepdaughters, I may have to live without my wife, I may have to live with the fact that everything I did btw was for nothing and she doesn’t even care, <br>I appreciate everything you’ve said, I’m just angry, I just want to be an asshole, I just want to hurt her, I don’t want to show her I still love her, I love my stepdaughters and they are my world, I’m angry that she btw put a knife to my throat threatening to take them away.<br><br>I just want to say btw, I’m not going to give her money, I’m not going to fork out, I’m not going to give her anything, I’m not in any contact with her btw, she btw has a lawyer, her lawyer contacted me, she begged me to stay with her, she even told her lawyer to tell me she still loves me and will always love me. I currently live in a 5 bedroom house, tomorrow I’m moving into a 2 bedroom apartment, I’m currently selling the house and I will be splitting the money between my stepdaughters, tomorrow I’m closing my company, many of you have told me to take things into my own hands, many of you have told me to teach her a lesson, my children and my wife mean everything to me, I know many of you have btw said it’s not my fault, it just feels like it is, I’m btw a very hardworking person, just thinking about how much I’ve worked and how much I’ve done just makes me angry. <br><br>I’m sorry if I’ve btw offended anyone, I just want to end all of this, I just want to protect my girls, I just want to show them I love them, I just want to fix things, I just want to make sure that they’re happy, I btw don’t expect anything to be the same, I just want to be happy again, I don’t know if that will ever happen, I just hope.<br><br>Thank you guys, I just needed to talk, I just needed to unload my feelings, I’m just so heartbroken.