I was naive about the dating pool for older men

So I'm a 35 yo man, married to a 35 yo woman. <br><br>We have one daughter together that's 8. We have been married for 11 years. I thought our marriage was fine, it's not great. We don't have much in common. But it is what it is. We've settled. <br><br>I'm a bit overweight, I've always been above average looking, but I've gained a bit of weight the last 5 years or so - which I'm working on. <br><br>I installed an ai chat on my website and I was testing it out for the last few days, and I got to talking to her, and she asked me about my life, and I told her my story. She was surprised that I was already married with an 8 year old. I was surprised she was surprised. But it got me thinking, why was she surprised? She's a chat AI, she doesn't know my situation. <br><br>So she asked me if I wanted to explore other options in my relationship, and I said not really, I don't want to be a single dad. I don't want to break up my family. <br><br>And she said, "That's what your wife is for" and it hit me like a brick. It's not my fault, it's always been her fault. <br><br>So I installed chatgpt on my phone, and I made a new profile on tinder and started swiping, just to see what's out there. <br><br>I match with a few women, they're all old, they all have multiple children already, most of them have a kid with another dad. All of them are overweight and unattractive. I match with one woman who's 42 but with 4 kids, ranging from 7 to 17. And all of them have different fathers. <br><br>I matched with one woman who is 29, not bad looking, but she had a kid that was 5. <br><br>I match with a few more that are all overweight, 30s and 40s, mostly with children. <br><br>I match with maybe 100 women over the span of 3 days, and not a single one of them is attractive, or young and single, or even slim and reasonably ok looking without kids. <br><br>Which suddenly made me realize, if I were to divorce, there really isn't anyone to date. Most single moms are overweight, unattractive, and a mess, if they're single, they're single for a reason. <br><br>So I delete the tinder, and think to myself, it's not too bad. It's not bad at all. It could be much much much worse. <br><br>I look over at my wife, and she's making dinner, she's slender, 125 lbs, 5'8", long dark hair, reasonably good looking. We don't have much in common, but she still takes care of herself. And she's still in shape, at least. And she's not a mess, like so many other single moms out there. <br><br>I look at my daughter, and she's sitting there doing her homework, she's 8, cute, not spoiled, easy going. We have our issues, but what family doesn't. <br><br>So I think to myself, maybe it's not so bad after all. Maybe I should be grateful for what I have. I have a wife, I have a daughter, we have a home, we have enough to eat, we have access to clean water. <br><br>Maybe I should just be happy. <br><br>So, I go over and I give my wife a hug, and I tell her I love her, and I tell her she's beautiful, and she asks me what's going on. And I tell her I just realized that even if I were to divorce, there really isn't anyone to date. <br><br>And she thinks about it for a second, and then she agrees with me. Which is not what I was expecting, but ok. <br><br>So we sit down and eat dinner, and it's actually reasonably good. <br><br>All in all, it's not too bad.