People who insult feminism from a place of ignorance

I'd like to know how you feel about men who talk trash about feminism and perpetuate harmful stereotypes about feminists. Do you feel like you must speak up? Do you feel like you just ignore them because they are not in control of their own thoughts? Do you feel like a lost cause and their unwillingness to inform themselves is the fault of a rigged system?<br><br>I have a few male friends who do this. They have never spoken to a feminist in person. They have never read a single feminist text. But they think that "modern feminism" is a farce and that feminists are grossly misrepresenting the statistics when they say that 1 in 5 women are raped. They think that there are many more men who are raped than women, but a woman will only lose her virginity to a man, not to another woman, so this would be impossible, but it doesn't matter what I say. They will not listen. <br><br>That being said, I still like these guys. I have been friends with them for a long time, and they are kind to me. They are respectful and considerate. They have good qualities and I feel capable of loving them despite their flaws, just as you would love a friend who occasionally does something obnoxious or annoying. <br><br>I must admit, when I hear them talk this way, I feel very much like I want to take a massive shit on them. But then I think - do I really believe they are responsible for the way they think? Or is the patriarchy responsible? They were born into a misogynistic society. They have been fed lies and misinformation since they were a child. Is it really entirely their fault? Or would they be capable of change if society allowed it? <br><br>So I babysit these men and I allow them to maintain the illusion that they are masters of their own destiny and that of others. I pretend to be subservient. I pretend to be weak. I pretend to be stupid. But really I'm just trying to manipulate them because I see how their thoughts hurt others and perpetuate harm. I'm trying to make society a better place, but I feel like I'm only helping to reinforce the patriarchy. <br><br>This is my dilemma. <br><br>What do you think? Has anyone else ever felt this way?