My cycle of shoplifting

I stole at a young age in school, it was so exhilarating. I got caught by the police at 12 I was just given a caution. I remember the cycle, I would steal the item, bring it home, use it, then throw it away. I would get anxious keeping these stolen items so I would get rid of them all. I feel like I did it more for the thrill than the need to steal. I was a middle class girl. I went on to do it several times and then stopped when I got out of high school. I also had a drinking problem. I would get so drunk, the next day I would have no idea who I was with, what I did, or if I shoplifted. I was kicked out of school at age 14 in 9th, I was a shy girl and then I started hanging with the bad kids at school. <br><br>Things got worse, I was in and out of jail a few times, and got in trouble for it, but never went to prison, I felt lucky. I got sober at age 16. I remember staying sober for 18 months, then relapsing. I got pregnant and lost the baby, it was a hard reality check, I got sober again and joined a program. This time I worked through all my problems. I was finally able to stop drinking. I am now 28 and have 2 kids. I realize I have a problem when I have anxiety, and how I used to self soothe. I still have a problem with drinking, it seems like since I got pregnant I have been able to stop. I used to relapse at least 4X a month. I still just can't imagine drinking at this point. <br><br>I also, found out I have a condition that makes alcohol and drugs make me feel sick. So when I am drunk I throw up and get very very sick. I used to drink and black out. I am so happy to be strong and have my kids. I still deal with issues with addiction. But I am trying to be positive about my life. I think if I can beat my addiction I can do anything. But I haven't beat it, I just haven't drank in over 8 years. <br><br>I don't know if this belongs here, but I thought I would share my story. And let younger people know how far you can go and still come out of it and be a strong person. Also, if you have this behavior pattern of addiction, you can learn to deal with it and be successful in life.