My dying alien murderer friend wants me to take his place in his war, I say we get the wife instead.

My name is Alex Hemming. I was a 22-year-old mechanic living in a small town in Wyoming. I was pretty much a nobody. I was walking home from work when the accident happened. Now, I wasn’t in a car. Nor was I in an accident by definition. I was walking. It was evening, and the sun was setting. And that’s when I saw it. A strange, glowing light hurtling down from the sky. It was strange, I couldn’t tell the size. It looked like a star, but it was fast. Too fast. I didn’t even have time to move. And then it happened. I was covered in blinding light that sent me to the ground. That’s when I heard it. <br><br>“You!” It was a loud voice, but it was also cracked. It was breaking up. “I need your help. You may be our only hope.”<br><br>I stumbled to my feet, dazed and confused. When I saw him, I froze. It was an alien. Tall, with blue skin and grey “armor” covering him. It was also much larger than me. He was a big alien. But it was also an alien. I wasn’t frozen for long. My feet started moving, and I was off in a sprint. I was fast, but no need to worry, it was almost nothing to him. I was held in mid-air, unable to struggle. He was a big man after all. Now I was held in mid-air, staring into his exasperated eyes. Not mad. Just sad. He looked like he’d had a long day. So I talked. “I mean. What do you need help with?”<br><br>“I need you to take my place as Gorthok the Unstoppable.” I stared blankly. “I am in this position because you killed me.” I stared again. This was a lot to take in. Finally, I talked. “Sorry?”<br><br>“No, it is fine. I was just about to die. My internal organs are shutting down. I am dying.” He stumbled, and I was dropped to the ground. “I think this will be over soon. Thank you, human.” And with that, Gorthok the Unstoppable collapsed to the ground. I drew my gun in shock, and then I saw it. A small device on his belt. I ran over and grabbed it, and now it was in my hand. And then I saw it. A holographic device. A screen popped up in front of me. And then I saw a map. I think this was a GPS. I looked closer, I had a route set. I figured this was on an autopilot, so I had a long time to think about it. Gorthok the Unstoppable had to be stopped. Hopefully, I could do it. Or I’d be dead. It was probably one or the other. At least I wasn’t bored anymore.<br><br>My thinking was soon over. I saw buildings. Then it was night. Then it was day. Then I was in space. Then I was on another planet. And then my journey was over. I was standing on an alien planet. I looked around. There was a sea of alien “soldiers”. They were tall, but they were much smaller than Gorthok. They were a reddish color, with long red hair. They were wearing black and red armor, and holding swords. They were waiting for me. They looked a bit worried. Probably because they were going to war. I didn’t see any enemy soldiers, but it was coming. I also saw a man running towards me. He was tall, but again, shorter than Gorthok. He was also a reddish color, with red hair, but his was much shorter. He was wearing what seemed to be fancy black and red armor, and also holding a sword. He looked worried. “Sir, Gorthok. I am glad you’re here. We need you.” I didn’t say anything in response. Gorthok was right. These aliens didn’t speak English. I was screwed. But I also held the “function” button on the device. “Translate.” I said. And, voila. I spoke English. “Sir, Gorthok. I am glad you’re here. We need you.”<br><br>“That’s strange. I don’t seem to remember you.” I said.<br><br>“Sir?” He asked. I couldn’t think of any words. “Sir. You seem different. Your speech. Your voice. Are you injured?” I was silent. Then I talked. “I am Gorthok the Unstoppable. If you ever doubt me, I’ll kill you.” There was a long pause, then he nodded. “Of course, sir. Sorry to have offended you. We should leave. Our enemy army is approaching. Shall we charge?”<br><br>“Yes.” I said. I unsheathed my sword, and pressed the function button again. “Spare functions.” It said. I scrolled through it. There was a lot of junk. I thought about activating my sword, but I think that would make it too obvious. So I chose a different option. “Shapeshift. To the image of Gorthok the Unstoppable.” I was covered in light, and strengthened. I now stood as tall and strong as Gorthok. So I charged. That was until I saw the enemy army. It was full of aliens. They were tall, but not as tall as Gorthok. They were also a sort of purple color. They were wearing green and blue armor, and holding spears. And there were a lot of them. More than our own army. And leading them was a big alien. Not as big as Gorthok. But much larger than the others. He was also purple, and was wearing fancy green and blue armor. He was also holding a spear. He was also charging. Straight for me. I charged straight for him. I swung. He swung. I ducked. And then he ducked on his swing. We both charged, and the enemy army came down on us like a wave. I swung. And I stabbed. And I killed. “I am Gorthok the Unstoppable! Fear me! All will fall to me!” I yelled. We fought. And we fought. “I am Kraid the Unyielding! You will fall to me! You will be defeated! The Ixari will win!” The big alien yelled. He swung. I ducked, and I swung. He ducked, and he swung. “You can not defeat me! I am Gorthok the Unstoppable!” I swung. He ducked. He swung. I ducked. “I am Kraid the Unyielding! You will fall to me! You will be defeated! The Ixari will win!” And so we fought. For a long time. I think we fought for hours. But the battle was dying down. The enemy were dying, and they were running. “We have won! We have defeated the Ixari! Let us celebrate tonight! Tomorrow, we will continue our war!”<br><br>“No. You haven’t won.” I turned. Behind me, Kraid the Unyielding. And he had a spear pointed at me. I drew my sword. We charged. We fought. Kraid the Unyielding died. The enemy was defeated. We had won. I had saved the day. And now we were going to celebrate. But a tall, green figure was walking towards me. He was also wearing green and blue armor, but he had no spear. He just sort of had a big smile. He was holding a large green bottle. “I am Ambassador Oboe with the Ixari.” He said. “I am here to offer congratulations.” He held down his head. “Kraid the Unyielding was my friend. I hope you gave him a good death.” Then he looked back up. “I am also here to make a message. We will return. And next time, we will win. And Gorthok the Unstoppable will be the first to die.” I think he noticed my expression. “That is. If Gorthok is still alive.”<br><br>I think Oboe noticed something. “You’re not Gorthok.”<br><br>“Who are you talking to?” I heard a voice behind me. I turned. The reddish man I had talked to earlier. The one that seemed to be in charge. He was holding a sword, and his eyes were wide. He was ready to kill. And then he looked back at me. “No. Gorthok. This isn’t Kraid. And it isn’t one of his soldiers. This must be an Ixari spy.” <br><br>“No.” I said. But it was too late. A spear was coming down on me. I drew my sword, and they collided. I stumbled back. My sword flew out of my hand. I fell to the ground. I was defeated. “Take him away. We will kill him tomorrow.”<br><br>I was dragged away. To a small, dirty cell. I was thrown to the ground. And then it was locked. I was alone. And I was screwing. I sat on the ground, and made a slight moan. And then I stood. And I walked over to the bars. And I looked out. I saw the city. It was night, so it was lit up. But I couldn’t help but notice the wife. I looked closer. It was her. Gorthok the Unstoppables wife. I recognized her. She was tall, and a reddish color. But her hair was black instead of red. She was also wearing a fancy black and red dress. But I also saw G