What if your afterlife is decided by how close your corpse is to a McDonald's?

Imagine a person just lives a completely normal/neutral life. Nothing really that good or bad to determine their afterlife. Maybe even a little of both?<br><br>Well, in this concept, your afterlife is decided by how close your corpse is to a McDonald's. For example, if a relatively neutral person dies and their corpse is 5 miles from a McDonald's, they'd wind up in a more neutral afterlife, similar to a nether world/Purgatory. If they died on the other side of the McDonald's from their corpse, they'd go to a slightly better afterlife, as the distance would be more like 5.1 miles. If they died right next to the McDonald's, they'd go to a relatively good afterlife, as the distance would be measured in inches or feet. If they died a couple of towns over from the McDonald's, but still in the direction away from it, they'd go to a bad afterlife, as the distance would be something like 20 miles. <br><br>This also means that the older a person gets, the less they can do things that might put them far from a McDonald's. As such, a lot of older people wind up living in houses right next to a McDonald's, so they can just roll out of bed and into the restaurant if they feel like they're about to die. The McDonald's would need to put a defibrillator in every booth if this were to be taken to its logical extreme.