My partner has had long hair for 10 years and suddenly cut it all off. Is it normal to feel this upset?

My girlfriend has worn her hair very long for 10 years. Before I knew her she was surrounded by “alternative” people and all wore their hair short but one day she woke up and decided she wanted long hair.<br><br>All this time she has worn it long, she had it cut twice a year but it was always probably 3-4 ft long. She never liked it beyond shoulder length because she said it’s too hot. We met three years ago and she had long hair then. It was something I loved about her. It was beautiful and suited her really well.<br><br>I have never cut my own hair because I was afraid of regretting it like I do now - I had long hair for two years when I was young and hated it. My hairdresser does a great fade every time and it means I don’t have to see myself with a completely different hairstyle.<br><br>I have always been afraid of change because I was afraid of regretting it. Once I took a “break” from my hairdresser and got a different style, it was completely different and I hated it. Now I’ve come to accept it but for the first year I hated it. That was five years ago. In contrast, my girlfriend has never been afraid of change, she has had dreadlocks, natural bright red hair, short hair, and now long to short again.<br><br>Two weeks ago she said “wow, your hair looks so good today” - that’s it, that was the breaking point apparently, the next morning she said “I want to get a pixie cut - to help my mental health.” She had started to get into fashion a little at the start of this year and got a tattoo of scissors on her arm (she had 0 when I got to know her a few years ago). I don’t know if it’s related.<br><br>I asked her if she was sure about it - she said yes. I asked her not to do it but she said it would help her self esteem and be better for her mental health. I said “it’s gonna be really hard to get used to”, and she said - “don’t worry about it”, “are you not allowed to change your hair”. I said “no but I don’t like it.” I was a bit angry then because she didn’t seem like she was taking my feelings into account. She then said “it’s just hair, get a grip”.<br><br>I felt really disrespected and humiliated that she said that. I was angry she was being so dismissive of my feelings. She said - “why don’t you get a grip, it’s not my responsibility to make you happy.” She basically implied that my unhappiness was not her problem or fault. I should take that as a sign that I should end the relationship - but at the same time, I am sad - I was happy, I had everything I wanted. Ever since she got the short hair I have been feeling insecure and unhappy. It’s making me feel like I’m going crazy.<br><br>Why is something so meaningless making me feel so bad?