I bought a house I can't afford but it's my dream home

I have never been so scared in my life. I just closed on my house, paid a fuck ton for it, and put probably 3/4 of my savings into the down payment. <br><br>It's an old historic house in my home town. I have been thinking of this house since I was 13 years old. It was abandoned and my parents would drive by this house on the way home from school. It felt like it was calling me and said one day you will live here. I felt like I was destined to live here. <br><br>It was abandoned for 30 years and the family who owns the house was living in their estate in the city next to our town. They only had two kids and both were boys so they never really looked after it. But when their dad pasted away and both their sons had daughters they decided to restore it. They got some crazy contractor who fixed everything but tripled the estimated price. They left it unfinished and for sale. <br><br>I had thought about this house almost everyday since I was in high school. I'm 39. It's strange because when I was about 20 I drove by the house and there was a contractor working on it. I was confused and I drove back to the house and asked them who was fixing it up. It was some guy who talked to the family for 4 years about buying it and restoring it but they didn't want to sell when it was this broken down. They knew they'd lose money so they fixed it up then sold the house. <br><br>I pulled into the drive way and talked to this contractor. Showed me some pictures of the inside and it was gorgeous. I felt tears in my eyes but I also felt a sense of relief that this house was being fixed. I returned a year later only to see the house vacant and the renovations unfinished. I don't know what happened but it stayed this way for 10 years. <br><br>Fast forward last year I have a friend in real estate. He was working with some clients who were looking for homes to flip. He sent me texts of some flips he found and there it was. My dream house. I felt a rush and asked him if he was serious. He was and said he would call me in 2 hours and we would meet up to see it. <br><br>I sat in my car for two hours waiting for his call. I felt like I was going to throw up. I didn't even felt this way when I was in my 20s and going on dates. I felt like it was meant to be. I own a car wash and I took the day off of work. Two hours later he calls me and we meet him. I walk up to the house, and it looks exactly like it did 10 years ago. We walked through it and I felt like I was home. It smelled like shit but I was so happy. <br><br>My friend told me the sellers are motivated and the cost was much less than what they were originally asking for. I look around and notice everything they did, the floors, walls, backyard, etc. This was my home. I walked in the basement and upstairs and it felt right. The seller was asking for 1.2 million. I only make 300k a year and the house cost so much per month. The realtor said I was in over my head. I didn't care I put in an offer. <br><br>They countered and we came to an agreement. I was so excited I could barely sleep. I am in the process of selling my other home and putting all the money towards the house. I know I could lose it all. I know this house is too expensive and my savings will be depleted but I am hoping that it will all work out. I don't know what the future holds but I am hoping for the best. <br><br>I feel like I've won the lottery.