I didn’t Sign Up for this Shit

2022 Update: I still teach. Covid is still hitting us hard and often. I’ve had to get really creative with teaching while sick. I still haven’t had Covid, but I had to ML for a week and a half because of a sinus infection. Last semester, I had to teach while caring for my dying father. I am tired. I am old. I am no longer a happy teacher. I’m still really good at my job, but I no longer love it. <br><br>—————<br><br>I didn’t sign up for this shit. <br><br>I make $56,000 a year, and I pay close to $400 a month for health, dental, and eye insurance. It’s not the best insurance and definitely not the worst. But at least I had insurance. <br><br>Last night, I cried. I was in pain, had a fever, and no health insurance. <br><br>Here’s what happened: <br><br>I’ve been out of school since last Tuesday. I had the flu and then a cold. It’s MLK weekend and I was planning to return on Tuesday. Then, on Saturday, I got hit with a vomiting bug. (And don’t think this story was written while on the toilet.)<br><br>Unlike when I had the flu, when I was just tired and achy andับท shit a lot, this time, I didn’t feel like I could make it to the toilet (make it to school) in time. I decided to ask for a substitute.<br><br>I did not feel good. So I took some medicine. It didn’t help. I threw up more. Everything hurt and I was shaking and didn’t make it to the toilet in time. <br><br>I knew I couldn’t go into work and drive an hour home while not feeling well and stopping at a drugstore for medicine. I needed to go to urgent care. <br><br>My insurance didn’t pay me for being sick and I didn’t accumulate sick time over the summer. So I was living paycheck to paycheck. I couldn’t afford going to the doctor and missing a day’s pay and paying for a sub and I desperately needed to go to the doctor. <br><br>I didn’t sign up for this shit. I didn’t sign up for a job where I’m overworked, underpaid, unappreciated, and unwell. I signed up to teach. I longed to teach. I wanted to make a difference. I was an elementary major. I was going to specialize in special needs. I belong in a classroom inspiring students to reach their full potential. <br><br>But the system is fucked up and I’m tired. <br><br>So I called my principal. I haven’t give him the name of the sub. He could find someone cheaper. Usually, the sub service costs me around $90. Students pay $15 per class; teachers pay $10. This sub was an actual sub. An actual sub is about $100 but my principal called in a favor. So this particular sub was only $80. <br><br>My principal said he understood. We were good. I felt guilty and told him I would make up the day during spring break. I wasn’t going to pay the sub and I didn’t want to take the day from students. <br><br>Later I called my sub and asked for a refund. He was understanding and sent me his address so I could send him a check for $80. I told him I would send give him a Navient check and he laughed. <br><br>Navient is the student loan people, and as a teacher, I qualify (or my loans qualify me) for loan forgiveness. I’ve been teaching for 8 years, give or take a few years. There are a lot of teachers in my generation who, like me, don’t qualify because the loan people fucked us over and changed the rules on us, took away our money, and kicked us in the balls. <br><br>I have over $300,000 in student loans.<br><br>I am a good teacher and a fucking idiot. <br><br>I didn’t sign up for this shit. But this shit is my life. <br><br>Edit: I went to the urgent care place. My bill was $150 and I was prescribed medicine I probably won’t fill. (I’m not a fan of medicine. It’s too weird for me, all the different chemicals, etc.) <br><br>Update: I probably jinxed myself with the no Covid so far. I just got my 5th positive test text message. <br><br>Update 2: As of April I no longer have health insurance and pay a lot more for car insurance.