I caught a kid next door peeing on my roof.

I was taking out the trash late one Sunday night and saw this kid on our flat roof next door peeing, he was a kid that was a few years older than me (I'm 47 now and it happened when I was 20 or so). It was in Palm Bay Florida, a Tampa Bay area town that was so new you could actually see the grass still growing out of the sandy side of the road sometimes. <br><br>I walked down the sidewalk and said "what the actual f**k are you doing?"<br><br>He looked up and said "I'm peeing on the neighbors."<br><br>I said "what neighbors?"<br><br>He said "your neighbors on the other side."<br><br>"Why are you peeing on them?"<br><br>He said "I don't know. It's fun. And if I pee on your house no one will ever notice. It falls down to the other roof down there."<br><br>I said "ok. but can you pee on someone else's roof? You're making me feel like you're doing some kind of witchcraft on me."<br><br>He said "you can't make me stop."<br><br>I said "of course I can't. I'm not your dad. Just don't pee on my roof. And don't fall off."<br><br>I get home the next day and his mom comes over to my house. (She's an older lady, very nice and also the mom of a swat team member who had his picture in the city paper and we were both proud of it.) She comes over to my house and says "I hear you saw my son on your roof."<br><br>"Yes. He was peeing on my neighbors roof."<br><br>She said "I'm sorry about that. But there's nothing I can do. I'm a widow and I'm his only parent. And I also have another son who's a police officer (the SWAT team member). And my son that pees on the roof is so angry at my son who's a police officer for being a police officer and a man that he's just acting out in the strangest ways. I've tried to get him to stop but he won't. He's got something inside of him that he won't let go. He hates his brother for it."<br><br>I said "I've tried to make him angry before by saying 'I'm going to call the cops' but he's not afraid of the police for some reason."<br><br>I said "I've never even seen him before. He's not creeping around here at night to peee on anyone's roof. That's just too weird."<br><br>"Why don't you try to get him to stop?"<br><br>"You're his mom. You can do things to him I can't. Like, if he takes his shirt off, he's grounded. If he takes his shirt off and starts to do the runner down the field, he's grounded."<br><br>"You're a very funny person. But why can't you get him to stop?"<br><br>"I'll try. But he's your son. You should handle it."<br><br>"I can't handle it. You have to cool your jets over this one."<br><br>"Fine. But you have to promise me one thing."<br><br>"What's that?"<br><br>"That he never pees on my roof."<br><br>She said "I promise you. I absolutely promise you he will never pee on your roof."<br><br>"I'm glad we could talk about this."<br><br>"Yes. Me too. Also, look out because he's on your roof and he's about to pee."