Update to "My (23f) co-worker (25m) keeps picking me for everything and it makes me uncomfortable. How do I stop it?"

After reading many, many comments, I decided to take the leap and talk to him about this issue myself. <br><br>I have to say I'm a bit disappointed that it didn't work out, but I wanted to try and remove the option of just cutting him off. <br><br>I waited until after the new year and then when we were alone, I asked him how he'd be starting on his weight loss goals and if he'd need any help. He said he had some plans but it would be great to get healthy too. <br><br>I took a deep breath and asked if he could stop picking me for everything and said it was making me uncomfortable. I explained that I valued our friendship and didn't want this to affect that. I also mentioned that I suspected it might be a problem with him as well, and I wasn't sure. <br><br>He got really quiet and his face turned bright red. He started apologizing profusely, saying it's not okay and he doesn't mean it that way and that he's trying to show affection and he's really uncomfortable when I turn down his offers, he gets anxious. He said he had a bad experience with his ex-fiancée (who left him after he proposed), and ever since then he has this weird fear of losing people he cares about. <br><br>He said he's been jealous of my boyfriend and has felt a lot of anxiety towards my relationship. I was honest and said that was a red flag and I wasn't comfortable with him feeling like that. He said it wasn't towards me specifically, but towards everyone he cares about because of his past. He asked if there was anything he could do to fix things and make me feel comfortable. <br><br>I asked him to give us some space for the next little while and said I'd let him know when I was comfortable being close again. He said okay, and even offered to go to therapy to work through these issues. <br><br>He hasn't tried to hang out or call me since, and has given me space. I've noticed when we're in a group setting, he no longer includes me on everything and I'm sure he will let me know when he's comfortable being around me again.<br><br>TLDR: talked it out with him, he's giving us space to work through it.