If you are European, please share your experience with dating Americans. Is it a one-way street?

I am a 25M living in Europe. I have a few American friends and they all say the same: "back home in the US it is basically impossible to get a date with someone you don't work with, go to school with or have a mutual friend with. Even that is no guarantee. You need to drink a lot of alcohol to have a chance." This contradicts with the experience of some Americans I know who are very good with women and date very frequently. So perhaps it is more easily achievable if you look like Taylor Lautner or Leo DiCaprio.<br><br>I got some first-hand evidence that this might be true. My current girlfriend is American and she went to a Halloween party last week. She came back and told me that she met a guy there who seemed very nice and they kind of hit it off. I helped him make a Tinder account and he got matches almost immediately. One of the girls even slid into the DMs. He went on a date with the girl and it went very well.<br><br>I then made a Tinder account myself to get a feel of it. I am average looking and learn English at the moment. In only 15 minutes I got 2 matches. The girls looked very unattractive and didn't seem to care about physical appearance. They only mentioned how much they liked memes (so low value). I talked to the first one a bit and asked her what she likes in a partner. She said "be nice and I think you'll have a chance". So basically only care about others, work hard and you'll find a partner. This comes close to the description of incels.<br><br>I am a strong believer in that men and women have different roles in the modern society. I do not mind being the one to make the initiative and put in a lot of effort in a relationship. I consider it to be a fair distribution of roles. However, I think it is very unfair to only expect men to be nice, hardworking, loyal and brave. Men should also be allowed to express their anger or hatred towards something, they shouldn't be expected to be too polite or demure. I feel this might be prevented in many US highschools (I only know about this from movies) because it makes men appear stupid or evil.<br><br>In my experience, a lot of Europeans seem to be very caring, understanding, tolerant and non-judgmental. I think this is partly due to the high value that sex has in modern society. You don't want to ruin your chances of getting laid, so you need to appear as attractive as possible. It seems that most people are willing to overlook some flaws to find a partner. I think Europeans are also taught to treat everybody equally no matter what their race, religion, sex, orientation or ethnicity is. I think this comes from a long history of war and bloodshed. It is easier to focus on common grounds instead of what separates us.<br><br>When I was 17, I was very interested in science and I think I would have classified myself as an incel. I believed that you need to work extremely hard for your career and you can't enjoy life too much because you'll have nothing to fall back on in old age. You also need to be extremely caring and understanding towards your partner, put their needs before yours, always be loyal and not expect anything in return. It is a very bitter outlook on life, and I think many Europeans would disagree with this. They are often very laid back and open-minded, and they might even fuck multiple times a week (this might also be because they're often very attractive).<br><br>If I had to give a hint of advice to Americans reading this: try to become more open-minded and non-judgemental. Be willing to take risks and try out new things. You might need to move to another city or state and work several low paying jobs to save enough money for a plane ticket. It might take some time, but it might be easier than you think.<br><br>I am sorry if this post seems very long. I am also sorry if this post seems very pointless.