I’m done.

I’m an ICU nurse in Reno. I can’t do this any more. <br><br>I’ve been a nurse for 18 years and an ICU nurse for 14. I’m done. I’ve never seen anything like this and it’s so mentally exhausting. I’m physically and mentally exhausted. I’m just walking away. I’m going to go do Med surg for a little while and keep my ICU skills up to par so I can go back. <br><br>Last night was just the be all and end all for me. Our company hasn’t filmed a decent ad for nurses. Our commercials are about God and how a patient forgave someone. Useless shit. I think we need an ad that says “are you tired of being called a hero? Do you want to work for a company that doesn’t care about you?” <br><br>I cry so much. We all do. I put myself through nursing school. I didn’t get any help or have a sugar daddy. I have paid for every class, every book, I have shelter and food for myself. Everything is on me. I didn’t expect to be babied through this shit. I just wish that our upper management would say “hey, you know what? Everything is going to be OK. You’re doing great. We know you’re crying and some are having meltdowns. We get it. You’re doing your best. Go outside and get some fresh air. Take a walk. Let’s make sure you have food and water. We believe in you. You’re the best.”<br><br>But no. We get emails, daily, about how we must do better. I’m just so sad. We’re at a loss for what’s going on. We’re doing everything we can, we’re running around like maniacs, literally fleeing from room to room, doing everything we can to keep these patients alive. We’re doing every possible thing for them and the emails from management and upper management make me feel like shit. I feel like a piece of shit. I’m overworked, over stressed, sleep deprived, and in a depressive funk.