Am I the Asshole for telling my Dad that I don’t want my child to be a soldier?

I(28) am the daughter of a retired army colonel. He is very proud of being in the army and the fact that he served the country. I know this might sound a bit weird but the ideology behind the army and serving the nation just doesn’t sit right with me. Maybe because I have seen my dad go through so much, leaving us during holidays and returning after months, the health issues that he has now, the nightmares that he has, his ptsd attacks, I don’t know if I ever want to put my child through that. <br><br>My husband is currently on a business trip and I visited my parents to take a break from being lonely at home. My parents were discussing about our 4 month old son and how they hope that he becomes a part of the army as well. I told them that it’s too early to discuss this and I want him to study whatever he wants. My husband is in tech btw. <br><br>My parents told me that they want him to serve the nation and it’s a great honor for us if he does. I told them I don’t want him to and they are upset about it. My dad told me that I am disrespecting him and his choices by making this decision. A few days ago, while feeding my son and putting him to sleep, my son started crying because he was scared and I was trying to comfort him. My dad made a comment saying that maybe he is afraid because he is a coward and doesn’t want to be in the army. <br><br>I got mad and told him that he can’t blame a 4 month old baby for this and he is too young to decide this. I left with my son the next day but my dad hasn’t called me and when I tried calling him, mom told me that he will call when he is ready to and that I shouldn’t have said what I said.<br><br>I have been thinking if I did the right thing by saying what I said. I know my dad had a difficult life but I don’t want my son to go through the same. I am with my in laws right now and they said that I’ve done the right thing and that it’s my decision so I should have the last say.<br><br>Am I the asshole here?