I was at the beach yesterday, and witnessed something which made me re-evaluate my entire life choices.

So, I’m 40 M and recently got divorced after 8 years of marriage, we have a son together now 2, who’s the light of my life, and I’ve sort of started dating again, but nothing serious. I generally feel like I’m doing fine after the divorce, getting by day by day and taking care of the kid and all, until yesterday.<br><br>So I took a break from everything and decided to take our son to the beach, since he’s finally old enough to enjoy it, and I needed a break from the 24/7 parental duties. We had a great time there, and I took turns to just chill in the shade and read a book while the kid plays in the water. Everything was great, until I saw something which made me question every life choice I’ve made.<br><br>So there were these two girls maybe mid 20s, who were there with their moms, and were complaining about how they can’t get a guy to hit on them, despite the place being full of men. Their moms were trying to encourage them to approach some guy, one of whom was clearly very out of shape and old, and was playing lo-fi in the shade while his wife and kids played nearby. The moms convinced the daughters to go hit on the guy playing music, and I witnessed this interaction.<br><br>The guy was literally a classic incel dream, short, out of shape, ugly as sin, and likely making very little money, yet he was playing it like a total champ. He was charming and funny, and made them feel welcome, and despite being clearly not the most intelligent guy, he was genuinely kind and respectful to them, and they kept joking around with him until his wife finally came over and told them he was spoken for, after which they left.<br><br>I don’t really remember what triggered it, but witnessing that interaction made me step back, and evaluate my entire life choices. I spent the better half of my 20s desperately chasing attractive women, and trying to land a hot wife, yet in the end I got a very average looking wife, who has since left me and taken our son with her, new boyfriend in tow. Now I’m just a single dad struggling to make ends meet while raising my son, and all I have to show for my chase after attractiveness is complete and utter emptiness.<br><br>That interaction with the girl hit me hard for some reason. I realized I could have been that guy, who may not have been the most attractive, or the strongest, or the smartest, but was content in his own skin and had the confidence to show it, and women were attracted to him for that. Why did I give up on trying to cultivate confidence and self respect, and instead chase after physical attractiveness and trying to land a hot wife? Why did I let my own insecurities tear me down to the point where I accepted a mediocre looking wife, who clearly didn’t love me? What is wrong with me?<br><br>Sorry for the long post, I needed to get this off my chest. I don’t really expect much from this post besides some bitter confirmation that I’m destined to be alone and single forever.