I don't love my wife

If I'm being completely honest, I don't love my wife. I just don't. I don't hate her, I feel pretty neutral about her at this point. I've just started to realize that I don't love her the way a man should love his wife. I've been married for 4 years. We have a baby together, a little girl, and I was told a few weeks ago that she might be developmentally delayed. It's not confirmed, and we won't know for a while, but I should be upset. I'm not. I feel a sense of relief. If she is delayed, I'll be able to use that as a reason to stay with my wife despite not loving her. I'll have a reason to stay. I've been afraid to leave her for a long time, but now I have the perfect reason to stay. If our daughter is delayed, I'll have been given a reason to stay with a wife that I don't love.<br><br>I've been given an out and I didn't even ask for it. I need to divorce my wife, but I'm so glad that our daughter might slow down my divorce. It's fucked up.