UPDATE: My girlfriend [21F] wants to add poppers to our couples bedroom. I’m [22M] not sure.

So I wanted to give everyone an update. I did end up bringing it up to my girlfriend and she was super excited I did. I said we should set some boundaries for if we ever do end up bringing the popper in the room and she was very understanding. <br><br>I’m going to be pick up in a few and we are going to do some more couples activities. She did say she had a few more things she wanted to try. But we are definitely going to set more boundaries. Like when one of us is finished, we are not going to use it anymore. Also she agreed to only use it when we are both ready to be intimate. <br><br>I’m actually kind excited now! Thanks for all the advice, you all have convinced me to be more open. Also, I can always say no, and we have agreed if it goes to far, we can always stop. I’m feeling way better and way more excited to see what we can do.<br><br>We are going to go slow and take it one step at a time. I’m so glad I had this platform to express my worries. I don’t think I would have been so open if it wasn’t for all the wonderful people in in this sub.<br><br>Thank you! Have a great night :) <br><br>EDIT: I didn’t expect this to blow up so much. Also, no we are not breaking up lol. I talked to my girlfriend and we have decided once a week we are going to have a “spicy night” night and this is when we will incorporate the poppers. We will also be incoporating other toys and some other things but we just want to have a night where we can explore and figure out what we want and what we don’t want. So, I will update in a week and let you all know how it goes.<br><br>Also, I would like to say thank you. Thank you to everyone who posted and who gave advice. I didn’t know how to approach it but you all helped me to. <br><br>And to the people who posted nasty things… why? That’s just gross and screwed up. I literally blocked like 20 people last night who were commenting gross shit and I’m going to continue to do so. Grow up and stop being weird. Also, stop sliding into my DMs with weird shit.<br><br>Alright, well I think that’s it! Thanks so much! xoxo, Cate<br><br>EDIT 2: I think they call it a “spicy night” night because it’s “spicy”. I’ve also seen in other context it be called a “spicy night” night. I do not know if this is a TikTok thing or not. I also don’t know if it’s a queer thing or not. It could be a TikTok thing, it could be a queer thing. But no we did not make up the term “spicy night” night. <br><br>Also, stop blaming me for being inexperienced. I didn’t know about poppers and now I do. Nobody was really educating me on them and this is my first real experience in a relationship. <br><br>Okay so last night… went well. I picked her up from work and we went to get some food and then when we got back we just sat and talked for a bit. She brought up other things she wanted to try and asked me how I felt about them and I told her. Some she was ok with, others she wasn’t but for the most part she was understanding and we did come to a few compromises. <br><br>After that we did end up doing a few of the things she wanted to try. I don’t think I’m comfortable talking about what we did but I will say I enjoyed most of it and I am looking forward to trying more things like it in the future. <br><br>So yeah! That’s it. Thanks again! I appreciate all the help and I’m so glad I posted here. <br><br>Also, PLEASE stop messaging me pictures of your dick and butt. That’s literally so gross and weird. If you sent me anything gross, I have blocked you and reported you. And to the people who have slid into my DMs your nudes and said “hot” or “eee”… I’m also going to block you. <br><br>Also, this is for everyone who keeps commenting that I’m not okay with experimenting because I’m not attracted to my girlfriend in the way she wants… that is not true at all. I am attracted to her and she is attracted to me. We both want to experiment and try new things. If that’s a problem, then that’s your problem. Not mine.<br><br>Alright! That’s it. Again, thanks so much for all the advice and help! Have a great night :) <br><br>EDIT 3: Hey guys, so I thought I’d give a little update. So last weekend when we were doing things, I was all ready to go… let’s just put it that way. It was all working super well for me and I’m actually kind of upset now that all of this has happened. Things did not go well this past weekend. I was really upset with all the hate I was getting so I decided to just delete everything off my account… it felt like my only option. Well, when I deleted everything off my account, that also meant deleting out all my pasts. That’s what really hurt. <br><br>So, I was in a really bad mind set. Emotionally I wasn’t really feeling anything sexual. I was just hurt and honestly a little angry. So my girlfriend and I were in bed and she was asking me “well, are you ready to go?” and I’m just sitting there like… yeah… I’m not. I don’t feel in the mood at all. But we had already talked about the popper and she’s really excited. So I said “yeah, I’m ready”. And we did it. All I remember is her screaming, a lot. I don’t really remember anything. It just happened and I passed out. But she said it was amazing! I’m glad she enjoyed herself. <br><br>But then the next morning I was really upset in all the hate I was getting. I literally cried all day. I didn’t even leave the bed. I was just so upset because I’m literally just a 22 year old queer woman and I don’t know how to navigate this relationship I’m in. And I came to Chambers to talk about it and I got so much hate back. And I just didn’t understand why I was getting so much hate. <br><br>But Sunday, I was thinking and I realized… yeah I deleted all my pasts but it doesn’t have to be forever! So I have been working on writing out some new pasts this week and I’m going to start posting them again. I’m even going to make a reel! I’m so excited! But I don’t want to do it by myself… So, I asked my girlfriend if she wanted to be in a few of my TikTok videos and she said yes! We are going to do a few tutorials and then we are going to also do a few more romantic ones. She’s super excited which is making me super excited and we are both having a great time. So, that’s that. Thanks for all the advice :) I don’t think I would have been able to get myself out of the funk I was in if I didn’t have this platform to express myself on. Thanks :) <br><br>Also, PLEASE stop sliding into my DMs weird shit. Please! That is literally so fucking gross. Also, if you sent me any weird shit, I have blocked and reported you. Grow up and stop being weird.<br><br>Alright! That’s it :) thanks so much for all the advice. Also shout out to all the people who have been defending and supporting me… you guys are all fucking amazing. I appreciate all your love and support so much :) thanks! Have a great night ;)<br><br>EDIT 4: Hey guys, so I’m back lol. So this past weekend went much better then last weekend did. My girlfriend and I were both in a great mind set and we were super excited to try things and stuff. And it went so so so well! We tried a few new toys and other things and we both really enjoyed it. We also watched a tutorial video on YouTube on how to use poppers and we actually did figure out how to use them correctly lol. <br><br>So yeah, things just went really well this past weekend. Thanks again for all the advice, I really do appreciate it :) also, PLEASE PLEASE stop sending me pictures of your butts. That is literally so fucking gross and I’m so tired of it. I get at least 10 messages a day of some dude asking “want to see my butt?” and me replying “no” and then them sending me a picture of their butt anyways. It is so creepy and gross and honestly a little threatening. <br><br>Also, PLEASE stop commenting or messaging or anything that I should break up with my girlfriend. I’m not. Like it or not, she is my girlfriend and I am going to continue to be in this relationship with her. I am happy in this relationship and we both enjoy each other very very much.<br><br>So, yeah! Everything is just going well :) I don’t know if I’m going to update again, but thanks so much for all the advice :) I appreciate it all so much :) have a great night :)