I’ve manipulated my boyfriend by lying about my “crushes”. I want to break up with him so I can date my TA.

I’m in my second to last year of college. My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years now. We met in my first year of college after we had a fight over a girl he was interested in for over a year (and I later found out he was interested in for 5 years or something insane like that). She rejected him and he messaged me straight away. We started dating a week later. <br><br><br>I found out about this when I was looking through his phone, months into our relationship. He said “what the hell are you doing?” When he caught me and I felt ashamed. I asked him about the girl and he denied he was ever into her. He was from a whole different city and he didn’t know anyone at our school except for her. She rejected him because she didn’t want to date someone she didn’t know. I asked why he didn’t try to get to know her friends and that’s how he met me. That hurt. <br><br>I’ve manipulated him by lying about other “crushes” I have ever since. I get close to certain guys and he gets jealous. I end up going back to him, sometimes weeks or months later. I make up all sorts of stuff to make him jealous like “they tried to kiss me and I had to stop them”. It’s sick. <br><br><br>The reason I’ve been doing this is because he’s really not into me. He doesn’t like how I look and he said something like “I don’t find you that attractive but all these other guys do. That kind of makes you attractive to me, you know?” <br><br><br>I want to break up with him and I now have someone else in mind. I met him this semester. He’s my 22 year old teaching assistant. We get along really well and I’ve been flirting with him the whole time. He seems to flirt back sometimes. I’m giving him a hard time because I know he doesn’t want to get in trouble. <br><br><br>I’m trying to break it off with my boyfriend by making him jealous. There’s a guy in one of my classes who I now chat to all the time. He’s in my class and my boyfriend walked in one day when we were chatting and asked who he was, in front of the guy. I said he was just “a classmate” and that’s it. He asked me about him later and I said it again “He’s just a classmate, stop being jealous. Are you going to fight him? You can just walk away”. <br><br><br>I’ve been doing this for a while now and he’s now accusing me of cheating on him with “another classmate”. He doesn’t “trust me” anymore and he “can’t take this shit anymore”. I like it. I want him gone. Hopefully he’ll dump me so I can just cherish my “innocence”. <br><br><br>I know this is wrong but I really like my TA and I don’t want to get him in trouble. I don’t think he even likes me but I want to try my best.