I used to think being an incel was a "choice", until I couldn't choose anymore.

My whole life, I thought being an incel was just a "choice", and that we could "choose" to not be an incel whenever we wanted. I mean, sure, I found it strange that incels even existed, and that they would choose to give up on dating, but hey, it was their choice, right?<br><br>Well, here I am, unable to get a date, unable to get a girlfriend, unable to even get a conversation with a girl anymore.<br><br>Last month, I saw someone I'd known for years, and had all but given up on. She had been the closest thing I'd had to a friend my whole life, I'd confided in her more than anyone, I'd shared more with her than anyone else. But she was never really interested in me, even back when I was fit, when I was younger, when I was more outgoing. Still, I'd always thought deep down that if anyone would say yes to going on a date with me, it would be her.<br><br>But she didn't.<br><br>And that was the last time I tried.<br><br>I've given up. I may as well just accept that I'm an incel. I'll never have a girlfriend, I'll never have kids, I'll never have a relationship. I'll be alone for the rest of my life.<br><br>Because every time I try to do something about it, I'm met with rejection. I'm met with disdain. I'm met with pity. I'm met with condescending, patronising, belittling and infantilising. I'm constantly told I just need to "work on myself", that I'm "not trying hard enough", that I'm "not doing enough". But I've done everything. I've done everything I can, and it's never good enough.<br><br>I used to think being an incel was a choice. But it's not. It's not us choosing to be alone. It's us being alone because nobody wants to be with us. It's us being alone because we're just not good enough.<br><br>**EDIT**: wow, this blew up. thanks guys