I have to be a boy today.

I was bullied a little for saying this, but I’m triggered by the idea that my own gender is inherently evil and that it’s okay to bully them as long as they have “male privilege,” because I was bullied relentlessly in school (up to grade 5) for the crime of having a penis. I guess that “male privilege” didn’t help me much then. I was a shy child with low self-esteem and believed that I was inferior to other people. <br><br>I was also subjected to a bunch of other forms of harassment that doesn’t allow me to be a “woman” today because of the disgust I have for my own body. I guess that “male privilege” didn’t help me in that regard either.<br><br>I have to be a boy today because I’m going on a trip to see my dad, and I have to fly. Flying and being in airports is hard for me, but I have to do this trip. Because I’m triggered by the idea that I’m inherently evil because of what I have between my legs, I’m going to be a boy today and I’m going to be proud of that. I’m going to wear my hair in a boyish hairstyle, my boyish clothes, and I’m going to be strong and hold my head high and be okay. I may not be a woman, but that’s okay. I might not even be a girl, and that’s okay too. I’m just going to be a boy today, and that’s okay.