I didn't mean to be malicious...

I was 13 when I got my first phone and only got it because of a miserable event in my life. My father passed away and I was given a phone in case of another emergency like that I could contact an adult I trusted to pick me up and take care of me. <br>I directly asked my dad (right before he died) if I could have a phone but he denied saying I was too young for that and didn't need one. When he passed I had asked my mom if I could have a phone and she said I only needed it if I was at school but it was the summer so I wasn't suppose to have it so I was told to put it away. <br>Of course, I didn't listen, and spent the entire summer as a dumb kid who thought they were cool because they had a phone. I had to keep it hidden from my mom because she said I'd have it taken away from me if my grandparents found out. <br>My mom worked 2 jobs so that left me home alone from 6am until she got home from her second job and that was usually around 10pm. She gave me a phone so I wouldn't be alone if anything bad happened but in reality I didn't need it at all <br>I never did anything bad with the phone. Did I prank call people? Yes. But not to annoy them, I did it to get a laugh out of the dumb things I said or the reactions I got such as my brother laughing from another room while trying to act like he was in on it too. <br>"Hello?"<br>"Do you know who this is?"<br>"Yeah you just called me.."<br>"I think you miss understood. I'm calling you. Who is this?"<br>"Who is *this*? I'm trying to figure that out since you're the one who called me."<br>Laughing from the other room.... <br><br>"I'd like to speak with your mother please."<br>"Why?"<br>"Who is this?"<br>*click* My brother fell for that one a lot. I didn't even prank call people I knew anymore because it was boring after awhile. My friends and family were use to it. They'd always answer with "Who dis?" and I'd laugh for 5 seconds before hanging up and calling them with a different number (I had gotten a lot of numbers from other people who had obtained them from other people). <br><br>But what I did wrong was give out my "secret" number to random people I met online. I didn't do this for a significant amount of time though. It was directly after my father had passed. And my brother and I had started playing this online multiplayer game a few weeks before he passed. <br>It was for a Wii and it was a sweet game. Think Minecraft but more so a game where you try to buy land and as much of it as you could, while also stealing land from other players. It was a ton of fun and I ended up meeting a lot of online friends who were playing the game. It was a great way to pass time as well if I wasn't reading a book or taking a nap after school. <br>I didn't know what AOL instant messaging was until my brother signed up for it and I'm pretty sure I got in trouble for it because it was around that time that I wasn't allowed to be on the computer if I was home alone. This was before my father had passed and I was only 12 then. <br>But after I got my phone I started giving out my number to people I felt like I could trust online. I didn't do it just randomly. I was smarter than that and at least I like to think so. But I still did it and I still regret it. I also don't regret it. <br>I've met some amazing people, most of who are still my friends today. One is my best friend and lives directly across the street from me. That's a story in itself. <br>But I also gave out my number to people who turned out to be weirdos. Like the guy who said he was a highschooler but later admitted to be a 28 year old. Or the two guys who admitted to hacking an entire website just so they could steal people personal information who had signed up for the site because they were stupid enough to believe they were getting free stuff. <br>Yeah. I fell for that too. I even gave out my address. (But thank the gods that my mom doesn't keep her car in the driveway and I had parked it in front of the house so they couldn't reach our front door and I had given them the wrong house number). <br>Other than that I met some really awesome people and some are still my friends and some even have their own kids now! <br>But I still have to keep everything a secret. I still haven't told my mom everything that happened when I was 13 and I probably won't ever tell her. But I do regret it. It was so damn stupid and I knew better. I was given the phone for a reason and I used it to play around with. <br>The point of this is, I got a text today from a number I'd forgotten existed but when I got it I instantly remembered who it was. I didn't block the number. I just forgot about it. <br>I looked at the message and it was just a picture. It was a picture of a sweet little girl, who just turned 1 and is the daughter to someone I met online 10 years ago. I am still friends with this person, who I'll call S, and I've even met up with them in person and keep in contact with them and their family. They even came to visit me when I went away to college for a year. <br>But the little girl in the picture, she's my friends other daughters daughter and I completely forgot I had her number! She was a person I had met online as well and S directly introduced us over the phone. We texted a lot and she even hung out with S and I when we met up and she was my friend too. <br>I knew she had kids and I knew her daughter was probably around 10 now. I didn't forget about her but I thought it was so cool S was still friends with her because we'd all hung out together like 6 years ago. We weren't close but her and I were friendly with each other. I even went to her wedding and her and I had hung out a lot together because we both lived in the same city. <br>The text was a little jumbled but I saw it was a little girl in a pink dress and a blonde curly wig. She was wearing some cat ears headband and eating a cupcake. She looked so cute! <br>I showed it to my mom and I said, "Look, my old friend S's daughters daughter!" <br>And my mom laughed and said, "You sure have a lot of friends!" <br>I said, "Yeah. I met her through S and I've hung out with her and S a few times. She's very nice and I'm so happy they're all doing well." <br>My mom asked if I'd be seeing her at Christmas and I said I didn't think so. I hadn't seen S since before the pandemic and my life has been crazy and I've moved around a lot. So I doubt I'll see her anytime soon. But at least I'll get to see her daughter who is probably around 10 now. It's amazing how much time flies. <br>But the truth is I hung out with S as an adult only like 3 times and it was all at a bar or a restaurant. I only met her once when I was 13. <br><br>But what really got me was the text I sent after I got her message. <br>"Where are you? I haven't heard from you in years!"<br>But what I was really thinking was <br>"why are you texting me? You're 10 and have your own phone? Well shit now I feel old."<br>And then I realized it was probably her mom texting me from her daughters phone. <br><br>But what I was *really* thinking was "Shit. I have to keep up this lie forever. I didn't know this person existed and I don't know if I'll ever see them again in my life but I just lied to her and said we're old friends. We might not ever talk again but now I'm just a liar who only talked to her mom." <br><br>I feel stupid. It was so dumb of me to lie. I could just be honest and say I hadn't talked to her mom in years but for some reason I keep holding onto my life as a teenager and I regret it but I also don't regret it because if I didn't do it I wouldn't be here today and have the friends I do today. <br>But I'm still lying about it. I'm still lying about meeting someone I only met once who I haven't seen in 10 years. <br><br>I could just delete the message, block the number, and forget about it but I might not ever see this little girl again in my life.... Maybe at a funeral. Maybe if she does something big in her life and I happen to see her. But that could be it. I could die and never see this person I claim is an old friend of mine. <br><br>And I don't even know what to say if she ever finds out. "Oh yeah, I didn't mean to lie. I just didn't want to admit I was a prick of a teenager who gave out their number to anyone I met online." Yeah that sounds great. I'm sure I'll get invited to her birthday party every year from now on. <br>I don't know. I don't care. I just wanted to vent about it. And honestly, even if she found out, she'd probably forget about it or even care. But at least I got it off my chest and I feel slightly better. Thanks for listening.