I used to think men were stupid for being so jealous and possessive all the time. I thought my husband asking me if I was cheating on him all the time was a behavioural problem. I was wrong.

My husband and I have been married for two years. I met him online through a dating app and we had a whirlwind romance. <br><br>In June I was in a mood one day and got bored. I decided to see if I still had it in me to get random guys to send me slut pics. I made a new tinder account with a picture of myself and added a bunch of guys nearby, then maxed out the distance and removed my age so I could match with as many people as possible. <br><br>I went on the app, swiped, matched, and sent some pictures to a few guys who asked. I thought my test was over. But then I kept getting matches. I matched with hundreds of guys. They all started messaging me. I sent my number to a bunch of them and then my phone just went off non-stop. <br><br>I realized that my test had only just begun. I started sexting with a bunch of guys, and it was crazy. <br><br>It was so easy. I was amazed. I had done this before, but the dating app scene was completely new to me. I have a bit of a baby face, so I was getting messages from a lot of younger guys. <br><br>A few days later I got off work early one day. I was bored, so I met up with one of the guys I had been messaging. We had sex for a few hours and then I went back home. <br><br>I felt weird, guilty, and ashamed, but I also felt good. I think it was because I was hiding something from my husband for the first time ever. He was used to hearing about my sexploits from my single days and my life before I met him, but I think there was something about the secrecy that made it enjoyable. <br><br>But I stopped after the first time. I didn't see anyone else, even though I was getting messages constantly. I told a few of the guys I had been talking to to stop messaging me and I gave my number to a few more. <br><br>I told myself that meeting up with a guy from tinder was a one-off thing, and I wasn't going to do it again. <br><br>I was wrong. I met up with a lot of guys over the next few months. <br><br>Some of them were good, some of them were bad. I met up with high school students, doctors, law students, air force pilots, army guys, rich guys, poor guys, cops, teachers, and tons of other guys. <br><br>I never told my husband about it. I knew it would hurt him, so I never brought it up. I sort of regret it, because I feel like I can't tell him now because he would be so upset that I was hiding it from him for so long. <br><br>I never felt guilty, but I did feel bad. Not because of what I was doing, but because I was hiding it from him. I wish I had told him about it from the beginning. From the first time I met another guy, I wish I had told him. I think he would have understood. I think he would have even been excited about it. But I never told him. <br><br>I told him in August when my period was late and I was worried I might have gotten pregnant. I had taken a pregnancy test and it was positive. I was so scared I was going to have a baby, and I wasn't even sure if it was my husband's or not. I knew I couldn't keep hiding it from him. I was almost in tears when I told him. <br><br>His face turned red and he said nothing. My mum and sister were in town, so I drove to a nearby park and cried for a little while. <br><br>After I calmed down I went back home. My husband said to me, "You know I don't care about other guys, right?"<br><br>I was surprised by that, so I asked him, "You aren't mad at me?"<br><br>He said no. <br><br>I asked, "You're not upset?"<br><br>He said no. <br><br>He told me, "I think you should have told me sooner, but I'm not mad at you. I know you used to do this kind of thing before we met."<br><br>He reminded me of the time I had sex with two guys and then went back to my apartment and had sex with another guy, a story he used to tell before that always made him laugh. <br><br>He said it was fine, and he wasn't mad at me. I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I felt so relieved. <br><br>I told him about the guys I had been seeing over the past few months. I showed him pictures of some of them. He wasn't bothered. <br><br>I thought he was just being polite, but as he said, he knew what kind of girl I was before we met.<br><br>I didn't want to keep hiding anything from him, so I told him about meeting the guy in July. I told him about how many guys I had been messaging and how often I was getting messages. I told him I wanted to keep exploring my own sexuality. I told him I was having a lot of fun and I wanted to keep doing it. <br><br>I told him it was purely physical and I had no feelings for any of the guys I had met or was talking to. I told him I wanted to keep doing it, but I also wanted to be completely open and honest about it. <br><br>He wasn't bothered. He said, "Yeah it's fine. If it's purely physical and you want to keep doing it, go for it. Just be careful, okay?"<br><br>I never expected him to say that. I thought he would be mad at me, or upset. I thought he would leave me. But he didn't. He didn't care. He didn't mind. <br><br>I think he knows me well enough and he understands my sexuality. I think if I had been talking to a few guys here and there he would have been fine with it. But I don't think he could handle knowing that I was getting messages constantly and I had met with dozens of guys. <br><br>I don't think he could handle that. I don't think any man could.