"Yup, I'm not movin' the couch."

The pandemic is over, and suddenly a whole fucking bunch of zoomers and gen z have decided to tinker around in their parents house and "clean out their room" for the first time in a fucking decade. It's as if they've realized that their parents didn't just buy their kids an ugly pair of fuzzy socks for Christmas, and that their parents aren't just protecting some fucking "childhood treasure" in their room. <br><br>No. Your parents aren't protecting anything. Your parents are fucking protecting their couch. <br><br>I'm tired of watching youtube videos of fucking zoomers who are fucking surprised that the shit their parents bought them when they were kids is fucking worth something, or videos of zoomers and gen z who have moved their parents couch to see that all it is is a fucking heavy piece of furniture with some fucking springs and a flat screen. It's a fucking piece of furniture. <br><br>I'm not moving your god damn fucking shit out of the basement of my parents house, and I'm damn well not moving the fucking couch to see what's "behind it". I hope you didn't like your shit or your parents couch, because it's not like it means anything to them anyway. <br><br>I'll collect all of your shit and let you know what you want to keep and what you want to get rid of. But the couch is staying right where it is, and if your fucking generation expects me to move it for some dumb fucking bullshit video on youtube, then you can go fuck yourselves. <br><br>I'm not moving the couch.