I lied to my daughter

When my daughter was born, I was still a teenager. Her father was nowhere around, but my older brother stepped in and became sort of a substitute father figure for my daughter. When I was in my early 20s, I ended up marrying this brother.<br><br>I was in a questionable relationship for a while after my daughter was born, but it was actually very kind of my brother to look in on us and help me through that time. My brother is my daughters Uncle, and Ive always told her that she’s my niece as well, because I love them so much equally. That’s a different story.<br><br>When I married my brother a few years ago, he became my daughters legal step father. He’s been amazing to her growing up, and she looks up to him a lot. The other day, she started asking about her father, and if I’m ever going to find him and get married. She wondered what type of man he would be. My brother and I decided to keep the details about her biological father a secret from her. He’s not a great guy, and he’s been in legal trouble too. He’s not the type of guy you’d want to meet.<br><br>We just told her that her father passed away when she was little, and that we’re a complete family just the way it is. My brother and I are happy, and our daughter is happy too. She was satisfied with the answer, but I feel horrible for lying to her. She’s right at the age where she’s old enough to start making good decisions for herself, but she’s still young and overly dependent on us. <br><br>I know that if she were to meet him one day he probably wouldn’t treat her right, and in return, she’d come running back to us, heartbroken.<br><br>I believe that in this case, it’s better that she doesn’t know. Still, I feel guilty for lying about something like this. This is a pretty heavy burden to carry on my conscious, and I feel guilty and anxious when I think about it. My brother and I have an understanding about this, so I don’t feel like I’m in this alone. <br><br>My daughter is just so precious, and I wanted to protect her from being hurt. I don’t know when or if I’ll ever tell her the truth,<br><br> EDIT I did not marry my biological brother. <br><br>I’m sorry I didn’t explain it clearly. It was an error on my part. “Brother” is what you call a man who is married to your sister in my culture. <br><br>My daughter’s father was an alcoholic who was abusive in the way that he’d scream at me all the time. He was a terrible guy, but I do regret how this all turned out. I’ve always been careful not to speak badly of him.<br><br>There’s a lot I didn’t mention in my original post, but here are some details in case you were wondering.