I was mad at anime for 10 years and I'm finally coming back

For the first 10 years of my life, I loved anime. I first discovered it when I was about 5. I watched Dragonball Z, Naruto, Pokemon, Sailor Moon, Inuyasha, Cowboy Bebop, Soul Eater, and Fairy Tail. Then when I was 14, I discovered Attack on Titan, and I forced myself to finish it. After that I stopped watching anime altogether.<br><br><br>I had the worst time with Attack on Titan. For context, I've always been someone who is very sensitive to violence and gore. I can't stand blood or the idea of being injured, I was terrified of surgeries, I couldn't stand the thought of pain. Then Attack on Titan happened. I had no idea what I was getting myself into. For the next 6 years I thought about Attack on Titan every day. It filled me with so much anxiety. It felt like I was drowning every time I thought about it, and I couldn't breathe. I didn't know how to process how it made me feel. I felt so sick. Even mentioning it made me want to cry. I couldn't even say the words "Attack on Titan" without having a panic attack. It felt like it had a hold on me. I couldn't shake the feeling that I was being devoured. I felt like it was constantly sitting in the back of my mind. I didn't know how to process how it made me feel.<br><br><br>But after 6 years, something changed. My lack of interest in anime really bothered me, and the fact that Attack on Titan was the last anime I had watched had really begun to bother me. I realized that when I watched Attack on Titan, I didn't know that I could stop. I didn't know that I could just stop watching something. I just had to push through it. But now I know I can stop. Now I know I can stop watching whenever I want, so I'm going to try again. It doesn't matter when I was forced to watch Attack on Titan, it was still years ago. I'm trying to get back into anime now. It's not about Attack on Titan anymore, it's about watching anime again. It's about doing something I use to love and enjoy. It's about finding myself.<br><br><br>I'm a little scared, but I know I can do this.