CMV: By default, parents do not deserve our thanks and praise any more than a pregnancy does. Our support for pregnant women should not be framed as a selfless act we are doing for our children, but as an obligation toward a fellow human being in desperate need of our respect, support, and care.

When a pregnant woman carries us for nine months and then births us, she is owed our thanks and praise. This is a pretty mainstream view, but I don't agree with it, and I would like to explain why.<br><br>The inherent value that an individual has as a fellow human being is not something that we should ever have to "earn." All of us are owed respect, support, and care by society, and a pregnant woman is no exception.<br><br>When we thank mothers for giving us life, we are framing *their* actions as selfless acts that they have done for our benefit. We are valuing *their* lives less than ours. And we are framing their choice not to abort as a choice that they made for our benefit. In doing this, we remove a woman's autonomy over her own reproduction process and frame her as a tool we used to get here.<br><br>When we should be framing our support for pregnant women as both an obligation and a bare social minimum, just as we would for any other human being in need, we instead praise and thank them for carrying us to term *because* they are human beings in need. It is *not* a selfless act to ensure that a child is born healthy and happy. This should not be something that we are expected to praise mothers for. It is a bare minimum.<br><br>We should not view the process of carrying a child as a selfless act that pregnant women do for us. We should view the process of carrying a child as a grueling and potentially life-threatening process that a fellow human being in need has to go through, and we should view our support for them as an obligation toward a human being in desperate need of our respect, support, and care.<br><br>By default, parents do not deserve our thanks and praise any more than a pregnancy does. Our support for pregnant women should not be framed as a selfless act that they are doing for our benefit, but as an obligation toward a fellow human being in desperate need of our respect, support, and care.<br><br>**Edit:** This post has blown up to the point where I cannot keep up with the comments. I would like to say thank you to everyone who has engaged respectfully and constructively. Please continue to keep the conversation civil. I would like to add some points to this discussion, as I have not made myself entirely clear:<br><br>1. I am not suggesting that blindly formulaic "Thank you, mom!"s are inherently problematic. If you want to show your love for a parent by thanking them, that's your decision, and you have to make it yourself. What I mean to say is that *we as a society* should not view mothers as selfless heroes who did something for our benefit. <br><br>2. That is not to say that mothers are not heroes who made sacrifices for our benefit. I am not disputing that. But it is not *because* they made sacrifices for our benefit that they are heroes. It is because they are a fellow human being in desperate need of our respect, support, and care, and they were denied access to those things for no good reason. It is the same with universal healthcare. Doctors are not heroes because they made selfless sacrifices for the benefit of their patients; they are heroes because they supported a fellow human being in desperate need of their respect, support, and care, and they were denied access to those things for no good reason.<br><br>**Edit 2:** I'd like to say again that I appreciate all the feedback and engagement. I unfortunately haven't had time to read all the comments. I would like to reiterate what I said earlier: please continue to keep the conversation civil. Thank you.