AITA for not inviting my daughter to my wedding, after her refusal to adopt my new last name?

I'm an American, living in the USA. My husband passed away last year after a long illness, and I recently met a great guy from Germany. We hit it off and have decided to get married <br> <br>I have a daughter who is in her mid-twenties, and she has been the light of my life. I am so incredibly grateful to have such an amazing child, and I honestly love her more than life itself. She's truly the best kid a mother could ever ask for, smart, beautiful and caring. <br> <br>When my German boyfriend suggested that I adopt his last name after we get married, I immediately agreed. I am <br> <br>part German, and I do love to embrace this part of my heritage, so I thought this would be a great way to honor my roots. <br> <br>I mentioned this to my daughter, and to my surprise she became very upset. She said that our family last name has been our last name for generations, and that she feels like she <br> <br>won't feel completely part of the family if I change my last name. She brought up things like family photos, holiday cards, and other stuff like that, where it wouldn't make much sense if I had a different last name than her. <br> <br>I could see why she would feel this way, so I asked my German boyfriend if he would be willing to take my last name after we get married. He said, "Absolutely not. I will die a ___", and that was that. <br> <br>My daughter and I were very disappointed, as she <br> <br>was really looking forward to having me keep my last name, and I was really hoping to honor my German heritage. <br> <br>I mentioned this whole thing to my best friend, who asked me if my daughter has considered adopting her future husband's last name after they get married. My daughter has never mentioned this, so I asked her, and she said that she would never do it. <br> <br>I told my best friend, who said, "Then there is no compromise. If she will not adopt her husband's last name, then you absolutely have to adopt your husband's last name. Because at least you are willing to do it, whereas she is unwilling to do it herself". <br> <br>I thought this was a pretty good point, so I called my German boyfriend and told him the good news. <br> <br>A few days later my daughter asked if I had decided on a venue for the wedding, and I told her that I think we are going to go with a German restaurant. <br> <br>She was very confused, asking "What wedding? Am I not invited?". <br> <br>I told her "Of course you are invited. Why would you think that?" <br> <br>She said she is not coming to the wedding unless I promise to keep my last name, which obviously I can't do at this point. I said, "Fine... well then I guess you won't be coming to the wedding". <br> <br> <br> <br>My daughter is <br> <br>livid with anger at me for saying this. All of our family is divided on the issue. Some say I should KEEP my last name, to honor our family, and others say that I should ADOPT my new last name, because this makes much more sense for my new husband and I going forward. <br> <br>AITA for not inviting my daughter to my wedding if she doesn't allow me to adopt my new last name?