I (41m) worked 12 hr shift medical attendant. My wife (38f) didn't appreciate me for a long time.

I (41m) and my wife (38f) got married at 19 and we never thought that our relationship could be troubled. We always pull through and better for it, but after our eldest child we started having a lot of issues. I thought we were doing okay, or atleast we were doing okay, when my wife ruined everything. <br><br>When our children were infants my wife used to work in a hospital as its manager. And it was a lot of her job, she worked 12hr shifts 5 days a week. <br><br>I never complained (because I knew what it meant to work like that), I kept the house clean and the children fed, and I helped her whenever I could. She was already tired enough and I wanted to help. I always tried to be there for her. (I worked in 3rd shift also) And after 4 years of hard work, she was moved to night shift and she was really heartbroken. But I stood by her, even when she was a little distant and angry, I knew it was just because of her sleep schedule. <br><br>I went through all this and always stood by her, always tried to be there for her, always tried to let her do her job. <br><br>But when I brought this up as an example to how patients I am with her during arguments, she started yelling and screaming at me and started to insult me and my patiency. Saying things like "this is my job, not yours" or "I asked you to help me, I never said that you're so patient and you're excusing yourself with that. You are my husband after all."<br><br>She started to take me for granted and I forgot how much I tried for her and now I am trying to stand up for myself but it's really hard. I feel hurt and I know I need to stand up for myself but it's hard when I really love the person and I know that she can be good, I have always been there for her. <br><br>What should I do? Thank you for reading and I hope you can give me an advice.<br><br>TL;DR: I (41m) and my wife (38f) got married at 19 and we always pulled through, but I would never forget how much I tried to help her with her work and how she doesn't appreciate me for any of it.