I don't want to feel this way

This pill is a fucking poison, I feel like i'm destined to stay alone forever because i'm a failure and i don't feel like working to improve, i'm just gonna exist. I feel empty, i don't have a reason to live. I never had a friend, never had a partner, never felt wanted, so why bother working on myself, it's not like i would be better off than i am now.<br><br>I hate myself, i hate the way i look, i hate my voice, i hate everything about myself, i'm the after, i don't even want to exist.<br><br>I don't want to feel this way, but this is how i feel. I just want to die.