AITA for giving my ex wife a houseplant as a gift

Update: S9 and I got married last weekend. My ex wife reached out asking if she could come by to return the house plant and to apologize. At first, I was skeptical but as it was raining, S9 was out with friends and it was overall a pretty chill night so I figured I'd take the high road. I offered to come to her place cause it was out of my way but she said she wanted to come by my apartment. So she came over and gave me the plant and apologized for how things went. I told her it was pretty much water under the bridge and she asked if she could stay and talk for a bit. I said ok but I warned her if S9 came home I wasn't gonna be like "don't worry she's just an old friend" and she laughed and said that was more than fair. So we sat down and talked about everything. She apologized for everything and explained that she had been feeling really insecure about how successful I had been. I was honest and told her I felt like she was smothering me and I can't remember everything we talked about as it was a long night but it was overall pretty nice. She was super understanding about me moving on and living my life. She said she's been dating again and has been in a couple of new relationships. She was the one who ended up bringing up S9 and wanted to know more about her. She asked me if I loved her and I told her I did. She was happy for me and before she left she made some comments about how S9 is a lucky woman to have me and things like that. It was really nice to close that chapter in a positive way. So I just wanted to say thanks to everyone who encouraged me to take the high road and give her a houseplant :) <br><br>Update: My ex wife reached out and said she wanted to talk. She was really sweet and she apologized a ton. We chatted for a bit and she said she wanted to see other options for the wedding party and she wanted to hear me out. I told her what I wanted and she offered some modifications that made it more traditionally weddingy but still addressed my concerns. We had lunch together and it was overall a very pleasant afternoon. Thanks for the advice, I really appreciate it. <br><br>I recently announced my engagement and my ex wife reached out. She said she wanted to congratulate me and I thanked her and told her that meant a lot to me. She then asked if she could come to the wedding and if I could bring my fiancée. I was shocked by this request as our divorce was not exactly amicable but I told her I'd see what my fiancée said. <br><br>My fiancée does not want my ex wife at our wedding. I told my ex wife that and she asked why. I told her it was because the last time we saw each other her, her mother and her sister ganged up on me and berated me for not providing what they saw as a good life for my ex wife. My ex wife said that was in the past and she's changed a lot. I told her that may be true but my fiancée isn't willing to take the chance that she'll revert to that behavior during our wedding. She offered an apology which I accepted and said maybe we could all grab dinner sometime. I said I'd ask my fiancée but I doubted it. She said that was fair and then she asked what she could get us as a wedding gift. I told her a house plant would be nice but she said she wanted to get us something more personal. I told her I wasn't comfortable with her getting us anything personal and she said she'd send us the plant. We said our goodbyes and I told my fiancée what happened. She said that it was very weird that my ex wife was pushing to be involved with our wedding and that it was inappropriate to try to get us a personal gift. I said I agreed but that I think my ex wife is just trying to get some closure and move on with her life. She said I was being naive and my ex wife is trying to manipulate me into doing what she wants and if I keep indulging her I'm going to make it seem like I'm still available to her. I told her that wasn't my intention and she told me to stop talking with my ex wife.<br><br>AITA for not telling my ex-wife to stop trying to be a part of my life?